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FuelMix - ATTITUDE AND ILLUMINATION

FuelMix   - ATTITUDE AND ILLUMINATION

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Monday, May 22, 2017

Lamentations In The Sauna

"It's not fair..!!" whined the GAM in the sauna, "how come YOU get all the looks and the attention..??  Everybody is ignoring me - and the place is soooo crowded on Saturday evening...!!"

FuelMix: I'm not sure.....maybe because I look different to the others. Just a non-Chinese novelty. Maybe  they're curious. I dunno.....I'm just another customer who paid to be here.

GAM:  Hah..!!  They're NOT curious about YOU..!! They WANT you..!!  Four of them watched you when you were getting undressed....even the staff on the Reception Desk smiled at you and said in Cantonese to the other guys to look at you...!!  Did you hear that...??!!

FM: Umm... no....I wasn't listening, I was nowhere in the vicinity

GAM:  They all touch your smooth skin.....they all like your body.....they touch you when you walk by.....they follow you.....and you just smile......that young guy......he just came up to you and kissed your face...!!  You know him..??

FM: No, I don't....

GAM:  He just kissed you and smiled and walked away....!! You tell me you don't know him..??!!

FM: That's the truth.  I don't know him.  But I'm grateful he kissed me [grins].

GAM:  It's NOT fair..!!  I'm just too ugly to get noticed.  I just sit here every time I show up and feel sooo sad...!!.  Guys like you can just walk in and you do NOTHING and people notice you.

FM:  Gay men can be very cruel.  I have been ignored and rejected so many times because of my looks and my race - and not just by Asian guys.  You should see the behaviour of white guys in their own countries.

GAM:  Why are gay men so cruel..?

FM:  Because gay culture is artificial.  It is based on looks and cock size. The image of perfection is very narrowly defined.  The truth is many gay men - whatever their age -  can't get beyond appearance.  It has trapped them in two ways...Firstly, Vanity that they're sooo hot and secondly, Fear that they'll lose their looks.

GAM:  But how come YOU get action so easily..?

FM:  Because I don't care whether I get it or not.  And I don't care about the compliments.

[A Sauna staff member walks by and gives FM 2 sweets and a condom]

GAM:  You don't CARE about the compliments..??!!  But YOU get sooo many..!!  They are complimenting you right now in Cantonese and come up and tell you in English..!!  Whaddya mean you don't care..??!!  That staff guy just gave you sweets and a condom....!! He totally ignored me..!! I've NEVER seen him do that before - and I come here more often than you..!!

FM:  Look, I don't know what the motive is of that staff member and I don't care.  The trick is to politely and in a neutral way, accept the attention.  Just show some good manners.  I'll tell you a dirty secret.....gay men will say anything to get to your cock - and they will gossip like hell.  And that gossip can be good or malicious.  That's why I don't care because I can't control it. 

GAM:  You have an advantage because you're handsome and you have muscles.

FM:  According to whom...?  The current crowd..??  What happens if a new crowd came in and totally ignored me....what would you say to me then..??

GAM:  But I know I am ugly.....and I have no more sperm to ejaculate any more.  Nothing....I am 45 years old and I can't get hard any more and I have no more sperm. I can't cum anymore.  That's why I just sit here and feel so sad.

FM:  You should see a doctor or a sexual therapist.  As men age, their sperm counts drops and so does the amount of cum.  But that doesn't mean you can't have good sex or get hard.  If you had a physical check up and a good talk, you would understand more about your body.  You are linking getting hard with cumming.  They are separate.  There should not be anything stopping you from getting horny and performing sexually - assuming there are no other physical problems.

GAM:.....Except my ugliness.....

FM:  No comment.

GAM:  How come you know so much about gay men..?  You seem very cool and relaxed about all the attention you're getting.  Who taught you about gay men..?

FM:  Mostly my observations and thinking.  Some research, I guess...

GAM [laughs]:  You should write about what you know of gay men.  You could help people...

FM:  **rolls eyes**

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