Gay Men And Forgiveness 2

It’s not difficult to find a gay man who has been hurt by another gay man. 

Sure, there might be different degrees of hurt. Some offenses were probably more subtle, while others were more blatant and outward. Regardless, they all can leave a mark. 

The reality is that many gay men are carrying past hurt with them day in and day out. The experience and wound gets re-opened each time they think about the look, insult or slur that was thrown their way. Instead of healing, the wound gets sliced open over and over again. 

On the other side, there are gay men out there who continue to hurt other gay men. Their view of the world is narrow and self-absorption is a way of life. Their self is the center of the world and they swing violently throughout the bars, beaches and community, much like a wrecking ball (cue Miley Cyrus). 

All of this creates a recipe for long-lasting grudges, cycles of hurt and monumental barriers to forming a sense of community among gay men. 

Is this presence of skepticism, paranoia and suspicion of gay men toward other gay men an old phenomenon? Or is this new? Is it something that wasn’t ever talked about or acknowledged before or are we facing a brand new beast? 

What I don’t hear a lot within the gay community is the concept of forgiveness. 

Merriam-Webster says to forgive is to “stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong)” and “to stop blaming (someone).” To “stop feeling anger about (something) and “to forgive someone for (something wrong)”. 

While there are certainly pockets and moments of love shown between gay men, there is also burning rage in the hearts of many — especially those who have been hurt time and again. 

Both Martin Luther King, Jr. and Mahatma Gandhi spoke strongly about forgiving others. King said, “We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.” And Gandhi boldly proclaimed, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong”. 

It’s safe to say that most gay men have been hurt by other gay men at some point in their lives. What would it look like for you to forgive the gay men that have hurt you in your life? Is it possible for you to let go of that hurt you’ve been carrying around for days weeks, months or even decades? Do you believe reconciliation is even possible? 

Maybe forgiveness is a muscle we’ve allowed to get flabby and weak. Maybe we’ve been holding out for an apology from our perpetrator that may never arrive. The truth is that when we refuse to forgive others, we only imprison ourselves. 

Every gay man reading this gets to decide: Will I carry anger or love in my heart? You can’t carry both. 

Yes, we need to educate our fellow gay men and be bold in confronting racism, classism, ageism and other -isms that too often go unaddressed in our community. 

I fear, however, that without an element of forgiveness, our posture toward one another will continue to harden. The distance and divide will increase and the toxic words we throw toward one another will become increasingly sharp and pointed. 

There’s very little hope of cultivating community and friendships when we can’t stand one another and when we won’t forgive. 

Forgiveness is messy. It’s complicated. Maybe we’re afraid to air our “dirty laundry” to the larger world. If we’re real honest with ourselves, gay men are not at all immune to hating one another. Perhaps a part of you hates other gay men in this very moment. 

While writing this, I came across these powerful words from Archbishop Desmond Tutu:

Forgiving and being reconciled to our enemies or our loved ones are not about pretending that things are other than they are. It is not about patting one another on the back and turning a blind eye to the wrong. True reconciliation exposes the awfulness, the abuse, the hurt, the truth. It could even sometimes make things worse. It is a risky undertaking, but in the end it is worthwhile, because in the end, only an honest confrontation with reality can bring real healing. Superficial reconciliation can bring only superficial healing.

Will gay men step forward to choose forgiveness? Will I? Will you? What will be your first step toward forgiving your fellow gay men?..................


-----"What If Gay Men Forgave One Another?",  by Josh Hersh, July 17, 2014, The Blog, Huffington Post 

See also: Gay Men And Forgiveness 1

What Is Race Play? 3

Now married to Superior Asian Male.  i drink His cum and He is now Man of the house.  i love Him and hunger for Him.  He gets anything He wants from me, the way life should be. 

-----"Asians Are Awesome", by shywhitesub.tumblr.com

WARNING: Sexually Explicit Images in link. NSFW
 

What Is Race Play? 2

You’ve been sucking his big White cock for hours and your jaw is numb. Your tiny asian dick has gone soft but still you continue sucking him and pleasuring him. 

That’s when it hits you. That small nagging feeling of shame. Your see yourself sucking his cock in the mirror and you can’t help but feel embarrassed. Embarrassed that you’re willing to debase yourself just to have opportunities to be with White Men. 

You tell yourself that you’re not like the other gaysians. You’re not a potato queen. You like guys of all races… but when you look at the stats, you find yourself saying “yes” to every White guy that messages you on Grindr while you say no to most POCs. [People of Colour]

You try to justify your feelings and rationalize your preferences. You exaggerate how much you’re attracted to non-White guys and you try to find White guys you don’t find attractive and exaggerate how much you don’t like them, but the truth is, the degree and quality of attraction you have to White Men is in a whole different league compared to your attraction to non-Whites.

You feel like a hypocrite for liking White Men almost exclusively. You try to downplay your attraction to them with your friends, because you’re afraid if they find out how much you love White Men, then it completely verifies their assumptions that you’re like any other typical gaysian. 

You spout all these ideals on social media about gay minorities and their marginalization, but you yourself subscribe to stereotypes about your race and submit to White Men.

But you push those feelings away when you suck his cock. You realize how much of a chink you truly are and no matter how hard you try to run away from it, you always come back to White Men. And after he’s done with your hole and used you like a whore, you stand there shell-shocked… ashamed at the things you did for him, disgusted at the names he called you and you called yourself, and loathing yourself and your asian-ness.

You tell yourself for the umpteenth time that you’re done with White Men. That you won’t be a chink no more. That is, until he messages you a week later, and you drop everything you’re doing and come crawling back to his…

BIG WHITE COCK.

-----asian fags for white men.tumblr.com

WARNING:  Sexually explicit images in the link. NSFW.

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What Is Race Play? 1

What is race play..? Is it just a way for white guys to be racist..?

Answer No. 1

Race play is the truthful and authentic dedication of service a useless nigger submits to for the greater glory of a superior White man. Fall in line, niggers. #WhiteLivesMatter
 -----Gay Nigger Cunt.tumblr.com


Answer No. 2 

Rather than responding with fantasy, I’ll answer this accurately. Raceplay is a form of kink sub-culture that eroticises racism, deriving sexual pleasure from the power inherent to racism. Some people in the sub-culture are genuinely racist, others aren’t and have come to it via their pre-existing interest in kink and domination.

One thing I want to cover is the idea that raceplay is something white people use to subjugate and be racist to other ethnic groups. It’s not that complicated. Raceplay eroticises racial domination of any kind- there are plenty of raceplay sites focussing on white men’s submission to Asians, Black men, Latinos, Muslims etc. Also, raceplay only works when both sides accept to and play with the fantasy.

Yes, raceplay has the potential to cause damage to people by inculcating racist ideas and making them think it’s “true”. But this is inherent to any form of powerplay within the sexual zone (fem-dom can lead to unhealthy understandings of femininity, Dom-Sub play can ruin people’s self-esteem). This is a risk that needs to be mitigated as best as possible, but one also needs to balance this with breaking the fantasy.

So when I do raceplay in real life I will always discuss it with a potential partner to make sure they are comfortable first.
-----fuck those asian slut boys.tumblr.com

Both quotes above taken from Traveling Gaysian Slut.tumblr.com

WARNING:  Sexually explicit content in all links. NSFW.

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Male Sexual Abuse

Suggested by a reader,  this site, named "1 in 6", offers guidance and a framework of counseling to help men (gay or str8) who have been targets of sexual abuse.  It cites scientific research that 1 in 6 men have been sexually abused and deals with 7 myths:

1. Boys can't be sexually abused;
2. It was his fault;
3. Sexual abuse is less harmful to males;
4. Only gay men sexually abuse others;
5. Being a male survivor means you're gay;
6. Males abused by a female "got lucky";
7. Sexually abused males with abuse others;

We like the straightforward nature of "1 in 6".  Its website is simple and uncluttered, the style is informative and non-sensational.  There is also a real-time chat option, either 1-on-1 with a trained advocate; or anonymously in a support group facilitated by a counselor. As part of their framework, they set out 8 main areas which we've linked:

1. General Issues and Cautions;
2. Masculinity, Self-Esteem and Identity;
3. Reasons For Hope;
4. Relationships;
5. Self-Regulation and Addictions;
6. Well-being and a Good Life;
7. Principles of Therapy;
8. Recovery and Therapy;

As mentioned before, we are always delighted when readers suggest storylines.

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Gay Men And Forgiveness 1

Underlining, highlighting and bold print by FuelMix:

Sex is easy. Intimacy is hard. Having spent so much of my life sexually frustrated, I didn’t realize how true this is until after a painful breakup with my ex, Kay.

I partially came out at 20. I came out more fully at twenty-five. But I didn’t really properly date until I was 29. Which means I had about a 10-year lag on most heterosexuals. The romantic and sexual experiences that most other people go through earlier, I went through later, but with the same emotionally undeveloped tools as an adolescent. 

So when I met Kay, I rushed in. I felt too much, too fast, and then we fell apart. 

This happens to straight people too of course. But I think our straight peers have the advantage of a larger culture that better equips them to deal with romantic failure. They receive mentorship either directly from friends or family, or indirectly from media, on how to recover from a failed relationship. 

At least for me, I spent much of my adolescence and early adulthood having my own sexual interests dismissed. And so when I finally found a guy who provided the fulfillment of a meaningful relationship, and then had my heart broken, I felt like there was never a point to it. I was rejected by straight culture, and now I’d been rejected by my own. I gave up on any kind of “happily ever after.” 

For a full week after Kay and I ended, I barely left my apartment and just sat streaming videos. I burned through all of True Detective and much of The Wire. Cocktail hour started at sunrise. I deleted him from my phone. I felt lonely all the time. I still do sometimes, though I’m better now at managing it.

Everyone at some point finds themselves feeling abandoned, as though alone in a boat. But as a gay man, I felt adrift, with neither rudder, oar, nor sail, as I watched my straight peers move on ahead. They too went through many of the same struggles, but always seemed to recover better and faster, while I bobbed around at the whim of the waves, traveling each way and none. 

I pursued myriad shallow relationships, rather than investing and losing too much by giving too much to one person. There are ten guys in my list of contacts with the last name “OKCupid.” There are 23 with the last name “Grindr”. For one of them, as a first name I just wrote “Some Dude.” Those are just the ones who made it into my contacts. 

I found lots of opportunities for easy sex, but didn’t push for anything more from the guys I met. 

I even hooked up with the same guy twice and didn’t even realize I’d had sex with him before until, as we were undressing, I recognized a familiar birthmark otherwise hidden by underwear. I still don’t know his name. 

Kay and I lived in the same city, which meant that we would run into each other occasionally. Each time it had been painful to pretend that we were strangers. As two gay men between the age of twenty and forty living in a small city, we were going to share space. We’ve probably shared lovers. But the isolation we’d brought on ourselves had been its own kind of burden. Even worse than the break up itself. The breakup happened and ended. The loneliness that came from going unacknowledged dragged on and on. 

Recently, I was wrapping up breakfast with a man I’d been seeing for eight months. (Both of us had been cautious—we hadn’t had the “boyfriend” talk. Love comes more slowly the second time around.) I received a text with the name heading: New Contact Found: Maybe Kay.

When I got the text, beginning, “Hi, this is Kay,” I felt fearful, anxious and angry. I looked at the calendar: It had been three years and two days since our first date. 

Kay was texting to say that he was sorry for how he had treated our relationship. For years, this was what I had most wanted from Kay. I didn’t want him to beg for forgiveness, or tell me that he loved me, I just wanted him to see that how we ended had left me hurt. But, even more than that, I wanted him to recognize that we had, once, been important to each other. 

The funny thing was, once Kay apologized to me, I realized I could do the same for him. There were things about our relationship that I was sorry for. I had done things I regretted, and had wanted to apologize for, but hadn’t because I thought it would make me look like a chump. I was the one who got dumped. So why should I be the one to say I was sorry? 

But after this exchange, I could feel my anger and resentment toward Kay evaporating. He had been trying to identify what was important to him, and had realized that he needed to take better care of his relationships. It was not something that came easily to him, but he was trying to do better. 

I felt that he meant what he wrote, and I made the choice to believe him. Mostly because I’ve been feeling the same way. And acknowledging that it, and each other, has let me release a lot of weight I’d been dragging around ever since we split. Yes, I had been avoiding Kay. But I had also been avoiding my own fears of intimacy. 

I’d tried to dodge every single guy I’d ever been on so much as a date with, which meant strategizing how to best navigate an ever growing minefield of discarded lovers. Sure, when Kay and I crossed paths we pretended we didn’t know each other, but I’d been doing that with everyone who’d shared my bed. 

Recently, I reached out to another ex after a chance encounter in a thrift store. When I saw Luis in the store, I spun around and walked out. Almost immediately I felt embarrassed and went back inside to apologize, but he had already left, or else was hiding in the dressing room. So I texted him to say how sorry I was that I had avoided him. That the next time I saw him I would say hello. 

Kay and I will probably never be friends. We don’t need to be. But at least we aren’t strangers any more. We can say hello when we see each other in the street. I even opened up my contacts and put his name back in.

-----"Dealing with Rejection: Living openly and learning to forgive", by Cirrus Wood, Beta, October 11, 2017


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Revenge Porn 3

6.  Nailing The Bastard Who Did It



To ensure the correct video loads, refresh the page
Copyright vests in the lawful copyright holders
 
(3)  Taking legal action

1.  Considering all the noise being made to globally control the Web, there are no uniform laws concerning revenge porn.

2.  Depending on location, the laws specifically against revenge porn are either non-existent or, may exist at a state or provincial level or, may exist at both state and federal level. Note that in the absence of an overriding federal law, if the victim and offender live in different states, it may be necessary to take legal action in both states.

3.  Note also that revenge porn laws apply to legally underage offending teenagers uploading revenge porn images of another underage teenager.  Instead of being charged under child pornography laws, they can be charged with distributing an invasive image, or threatening to upload an invasive image.

4.  Even if there are no nationwide laws specifically against revenge porn where you live, the fact remains that the unauthorized sharing of a sexual image can still end up being a criminal offence under existing laws:

• Harassment
• Stalking
• Intimidation
• Blackmail
• Extortion
• Breach of Privacy Laws - unauthorized use of personal identifying information
• Hacking of computer or peripherals or mobile phone
• Identity Theft
• Incitement - when your image is uploaded to other sites and users are invited to comment
• If the victim was underage, child porn laws might apply.

5.  Civil proceedings may also be possible for harm to personal and professional reputation.  Remember in civil cases, you start the action.  In criminal cases, you will have to persuade the police to bring it.

6.  Also, notifying government agencies that a revenge porn website is engaging in unfair, criminal and unethical business practices may get you some relief and put the heat on the proprietors of that website.

7.  And for those gay men thinking of getting into a formal relationship with a Significant Other...? A prenuptial agreement that contains terms specifically dealing with privacy issues and ownership of sexually explicit images PLUS undertakings not to spread them if the relationship breaks.  After all, if you decide who gets to keep the Lalique crystal vases, why should your dick pics be any different..?

Originally published 26 March 2017
Republished 24 March 2018

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Revenge Porn 2

5.  "OMG..!! WTF..??!!" You: The Star Of Revenge Porn
6.  Nailing The Bastard Who Did It

5.  "OMG..!! WTF..??!!" You: The Star Of Revenge Porn

We have drawn from the article, "How to Fight Back Against Revenge Porn", The Daily Beast, 1 December 2016.

1.  Breathe. Keep breathing.  Calm down.

2.  Defending yourself from a revenge porn attack involves 3 main steps:

• Collect the evidence;
• Getting the evidence wiped from the web;
• Taking legal action;

 (1)  Collect  The Evidence

1.  Save everything.  Repeat. Save everything. Resist the initial panic reaction to thrash around to get every pic and video of you removed.  Without the evidence, the behaviour cannot be criminalized.  Save the following:

• the pics
• the video
• screenshot of the web page where it appears
• upload dates
• all messages sent by the offender
• view counts
• all comments made by viewers - the comments may be derogatory, abusive, violent and graphic.  That helps your case in showing the harm of revenge porn because those commenting are also engaging in harassment.

2.  Re-adjust your social media privacy settings- with two factor authentication if possible.  This is because the offender may upload the images to dedicated revenge porn websites, reveal your social media handles, screen shots of your social media pages and encourage others to stalk, harass or hack.

3.  However do NOT block the offender from sending you messages as you still need to build up the evidence against him.

4.  To understand the scale of the revenge porn attack against you, Google your own name using derogatory search words that those into revenge porn might use.  For example:

• "Michael Smith cocksucking faggot bitch in Singapore"
• "Michael Smith cum swallowing faggot in Singapore"
• "Michael Smith cock sucking white Singapore accountant and closet faggot"
• "white trash faggot accountant Michael Smith in Singapore"
• "Michael Smith in Singapore is a cum swallowing accountant and cock whore"

5.  If those search terms lead to revenge porn sites with you on them, remember to keep screen shots of each one of them.


(2)  Getting The Evidence Wiped From The Web

1. The Cyber Civil Rights Initiative has produced an Online Removal Guide that covers Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Reddit, Tumblr, Yahoo, Google, Microsoft.

2.  From October 2105, PornHub, the largest porn site on the Web, launched a new content removal form for revenge porn victims to file take  down requests more easily.


COMING UP IN PART 3:

6.  Nailing The Bastard Who Did It

Originally published 22 March 2017
Amended and Republished 20 March 2018

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Revenge Porn 1

1.  Definition of Revenge Porn
2.  Social Media : Temptation, Apathy And Negligence
3.  Gay Men, Lousy Manners And Spite
4.  Revenge Porn In Context
5.  "OMG..!! WTF..??!!" You: The Star Of Revenge Porn
6.  Nailing The Bastard Who Did It


1.  Revenge Porn 
      (or Non-Consensual Porn, or Vindictive Porn)

Underlining highlighting and bold print by FuelMix:

Revenge Porn - Revenge porn (sometimes lengthened to revenge pornography) is the sexually explicit portrayal of one or more people distributed without their consent via any medium. The sexually explicit images or video may be made by a partner of an intimate relationship  with the knowledge and consent of the subject, or it may be made without his or her knowledge. The possession of the material may be used by the perpetrators to blackmail the subjects into performing other sex acts, to coerce them into continuing the relationship, or to punish them for ending the relationship.....

The term "revenge porn" generally refers to the uploading of this sexually explicit material to humiliate and intimidate the subject, who has broken off the relationship. The term is also often misused to describe non 'revenge' scenarios, including non-consensual pornography distributed by hackers or by individuals seeking profit or notoriety.  The images are usually accompanied by sufficient information to identify the pictured individual, typically names and locations, and can include links to social media to profiles, home addresses and workplaces.  Victims, whose images expose them to workplace discrimination, cyber-stalking or physical attack, can have their lives ruined as a result. Given the practice by some companies of searching for potential sources of bad publicity, many victims of revenge porn have lost their jobs and found themselves effectively unhirable.

-----Wikipedia, Revenge Porn

2.  Social Media : Temptation, Apathy And Negligence

1.  In Principles of Faggotry 32 we said this:

A dumb fag with a smart phone is a dangerous combination.

2.  What were getting at, was the danger of pervasive technology as well as the abuse and temptation they presented.  The plethora of social media, the access given to "followers", sexual hook-up apps,  hacking tools, photoshop ability - and now, A.I.-generated fake porn superimposing heads on other bodies, present a formidable array of options and weapons.

3.  There is a lot of social pressure to be on social media.  Very few gay men will stop to ask, "What for..?"  

4.  We suspect that gay men, in their never-ending quest for cock, are too jaded (or drug- fucked) to care, too negligent, haven't considered the web trail they've left, who has been given access to their pictures and videos, or they are more interested in creating multiple profiles to theoretically enhance their chances of getting sex.

5.  So, what are the fertile areas for revenge porn..?

• Lots of pics of you online that have been there for a while - and you may have lost track of where they all are;
• X-rated ads on hookup sites that could be traced to you;
• X-rated pics or videos you took of yourself and sent to the other party;
• X-rated pics or videos of both of you, knowing that both of you were being filmed and each party has a copy;
• G-rated or professional headshot pics of you that you uploaded to social media like Facebook or professional networking sites like LinkedIn;
• Innocent workplace pics taken with colleagues;
• WhatsApp or other messaging apps that turn into "sexting";
• Chat room conversations that can be saved;
• Hacking of mobile phone, laptop or desktop;
• Hacking of external hard drives and flash drives;
• Lost or stolen phones or laptops, not properly secured for authenticated entry;
• And no, faggot, Snapchat is not that safe.  Screen shots can still be made of images;

As the University of Adelaide's Law School pointed out in their online resource on revenge porn and cyberbullying, there is a deliberate or unconscious ignorance of the boundaries of sexual behaviour and online communication.  In other words, it's a minefield out there.  Not only is there pervasive and probably illegal intelligence agency spying of your laptop, desktop, tablet and mobile going on worldwide, but your cock-focused encounters carry high risks other that STDs. The Web has destroyed anonymity and seriously damaged personal integrity.


3.  Gay Men, Lousy Manners And Spite

1.  In Principles of Faggotry 82  we said this:

A Screaming Fag is perfectly capable of dishing out the Silent Treatment.

Frequently, in abortive attempts to hookup online and after pictures have been swapped, one party suddenly gets dropped without explanation - whether or not their stats are acceptable.  Face it.  It's happened to nearly every fag with a USB connection.  Emails and WhatsApp messages are ignored or blocked. The private window in the chat room goes silent or is abruptly shut. The Silent Treatment is in full swing.  The party on the receiving end of it is puzzled, humiliated and angry.  Fags are notorious for their utter lack of online manners.  It shows no signs of getting better. 

2.  Frustrated, pissed off and feeling cheated that having swapped pics, he was suddenly dumped, the wounded fag is in a perfect position to retaliate through revenge porn or online bad-mouthing, or uploading a fake profile with the other guy's pic and then claiming that guy is HIV or some other allegation.  Note that there is no relationship between them, other than the fact that both were looking for a hookup.  That sense of overwhelming cyber-rage triggered by another guy's lousy manners, is more widespread than the average fag will feel comfortable admitting.

 3.  "Sexting" is another problematic area that can go from flirtation to bullying and then abuse...and then revenge porn.


4.  Revenge Porn In Context

1.  It's a mistake to think that revenge porn only affects women since a lot of media coverage has focused on them.  The reality is that gay men are prime targets, because of their scattered online presence plus repeated ads and pics on the same sites - and even more so in those countries where Web usage is censored or monitored and where being gay or having gay sex, can carry severe penalties.  For example, in the United Arab Emirates where gay sex is illegal, there is no shortage of guys putting up their selfies on hookup apps, while offering to pay premium prices for a bottle of poppers - which are also illegal.

2.  Revenge porn might be a phenomenon but it does not operate in a vacuum. It operates within a continuum that ranges from entrapment (pic collector with a motive), anger, abuse, betrayal, bullying, blackmail, drug-taking, drug-dealing, date-rape, intimidation, threats, stalking, theft, reputational and professional damage. 

3.  There's some good news.  The criminal and civil remedies to deal with revenge porn come from the same continuum.

COMING UP IN PART 2:

5.  "OMG..!! WTF..??!!" You: The Star Of Revenge Porn
6.  Nailing The Bastard Who Did It

Originally published 22 March 2017
Amended and Republished 19 March 2018 


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Our Culture Of Rape

Charles Hugh Smith nails it:

Stripped of pretense, ours is a culture of rape. Apologists for the system that spawned this culture of rape claim that this violence is the work of a few scattered sociopaths. The apologists are wrong: The system generates a culture of rape. 

The engine of our culture of rape is the elevation of the entitled-insider class to untouchability: they are above the law, and more equal than others in their freedom to impose every sick sociopathology known to humanity on the powerless peasants imprisoned in our noxious neofeudal system. 

For the true sickness of our society and culture is measured not in the vile crimes of our entitled-insider class: it's measured by the armies of enablers, protectors, enforcers and apologists who protect the entitled-insider class from exposure and justice. After 25 years of blatant abuse of power and crimes that have yet to enter the court docket, 25 years during which the cream of the American media purposefully ignored his blatant abuses of power, the moldering putrid remains of American journalism has finally emerged from its fetid nests, trembling in the unaccustomed brightness of day, to "report," 25 years too late to save his innumerable victims, Harvey Weinstein's Army of Spies (New Yorker).  

You know how incestuous and cowardly our entitled-insider class is, and how they operate: for 25 long years, editors in the self-glorifying cidadels of American journalism killed every story that would have exposed Mr. Weinstein's actions to the world.

The same can be said of all the other predators hiding beneath the cloak of secrecy that protects the entitled-insider class from exposure. 

Voracious predators like Bill Clinton mastered the fine art of forcing consensuality on their innumerable victims, considering the act of forced sex as little more than a standard perquisite of power, much like having the hotel door opened by servant. 

The armies of spies, informers, PR flaks, security guards, attorneys, thugs, sycophants and handlers didn't just enable predatory exploitation of the peasantry: they actively recruited victims and set them up, just as powerless maids were trapped in the chambers of lords in feudal times.  

The truly sick reality of our culture of rape is that nobody involved reckoned they were doing anything wrong. The sociopathological predators reckoned they were simply exercising their droit du signeur, their right to take any woman they desired as a privilege of belonging to the entitled-insider class. 

Every single individual in the vast armies of spies, informers, PR flaks, security guards, attorneys, thugs, sycophants and handlers were simply doing their job, doing what they were told to avoid reprimand or being fired. In other words, every one of these individuals was a good German, pulling the trigger, defending predators from justice, protecting the most vile, sick abusers of power from exposure and attacking any victim who dared speak the truth, because, well, they were paid to do so. 

Were there no other jobs in America other than protecting evil predators from exposure and justice? Or did these good Germans secretly revel in their proximity to power, much like the SS reveled in their proximity to Nazi power? All you good Germans who served your overlords so well: please don't deny the thrill of being close to sociopathological power. Or were you just too aftraid of losing your own pretty perquisites? 

These are the poisoned fruits of a neofeudal system in which power, wealth and political influence are concentrated in the apex of the wealth-power pyramid, a system so corrupted that predators don't just get off scot-free, they are celebrated as wunnerful guys because their abuses of power are so well hidden, their victims so well marginalized and their PR flacks so relentless in painting over the rotting flesh of their corruption.

While tens of thousands of men and women rot away in America's teeming Drug War gulag, the exploiters and predators of our entitled-insider class are free to ruin and rape. It's time we stop making excuses for the predators of our entitled-insider class, stop accepting the cover provided by the worm-ridden decaying corpse of our corporate media, and stop the armies of Good German executioners who have bludgeoned every attempt to expose the truth of our pervasive culture of rape, exploitation and pillage.  

Our abject servitude is now exposed. We are peasants and debt-serfs imprisoned in a deeply corrupt and oppressive neofeudal society. Will we ever tire of worshipping our predatory entitled-insider class exploiters? 


-----"Our Culture of Rape", Charles Hugh Smith, November 8, 2017, Of Two Minds

Nearly Raped By A Deaf Gay Guy

Turning around to see who had called his name while navigating a chronically packed street here in Very Rich Megacity yesterday evening, FuelMix recognized a gym-fit 20 year old local college GAM with whom he'd had some casual conversations and fun times in the sauna.  The GAM looked breathless and in shock.

FM:  Are you alright..?  You look a bit strange...what happened to your face..?

GAM:  I nearly got raped....

FM:  Where...?

GAM:  [names sauna].  I've just come from there.  Look...[shows FM fresh scratches on his arms, chest,  face and abs]

FM: What happened..?

GAM:  I had already changed and had wrapped my towel around me.  I was sitting near the Locker area to see who would come in.  A young Chinese guy came in, about my height, wearing glasses, probably around my age or a bit older.  He looked fit ,cute, a little bit nerdy and smiled at me.  So I smiled back and watched him undress.  His body was OK and he was looking at me and smiling a lot.  I wasn't cruising him, but he was really staring at me.  I knew he wanted to play with me, but I hadn't made up my mind.

He changed and went for a shower.  I was still sitting there when he got back and he kept looking at me. I still hadn't decided whether I wanted to play with him, so I got up to walk around.  He followed me everywhere I went.

I was standing against the wall in the Dark Area and he came up to me and started stroking my body. I didn't say anything and he didn't say anything.  There was nothing to indicate that he was deaf - there was no hearing aid or anything in his ear.  I dunno.....maybe he had removed it in the Locker Area and I hadn't noticed.  He never said "Hi", or anything and neither did I.

He started to kiss my body and it felt good, so I let him do it.  He was licking my balls and my legs, stroking my body.  I thought maybe he was a bottom.  We didn't speak at all.

After licking and kissing my bod, he took me by the hand to one of the rooms.  When he removed his towel, I was impressed by the size of his cock.  He never indicated what he wanted to do or whether he was "One" [Top] or "Zero" [Bottom].  I didn't say anything because he immediately got on his knees and started servicing me, the same way he was doing in the Dark Area.  He was licking me everywhere and it felt really good.  He never said anything, just licking me quietly.

Then he motioned with his fingers that he wanted to fuck me.  I told him I was Top - and that's when things turned nasty.  He suddenly got up and turned me around, trying to bend me over.  I said "No" and repeated that I was a Top.  He pushed me up against the wall, trying to fuck me. I pushed him back, shook my head, said "No thanks", and attempted to leave the room.

I unlocked the door and he slammed it shut, locking it again.  He blocked the door with his body and  turned to face me looking really angry.  Funny noises started coming from his mouth and I thought at first he was retarded......then I realized he was deaf.  He pushed me up against the wall and tried to force me to the floor on my back so he could fuck me.  We started struggling.  He was getting quite physical and aggressive, making funny wailing noises while blocking my moves to stay on my feet and get out of the room.

We struggled quite a bit as I attempted to get rid of him and stay on my feet.  He blocked the door several times, even after I'd unlocked it.  His strength for a deaf guy was astonishing and that's how I got scratched on my face and body.  I was angry and frightened. Several times he slammed me against the wall, trying to get me to collapse on the floor.  I raised my voice frequently in Cantonese and told him to leave me alone and let me get out of the room.

People in the Dark Area heard that something was going on. I heard them making comments in Cantonese that something appeared to be wrong, but nobody tried to assist me by knocking on the door and asking if I needed help.

I was getting really stressed in there.  My heart was racing.  This nerdy, deaf guy had the strength of a gorilla.  Nobody was helping me and he was refusing to let me get out of the room.  He had got it into his head that he was going to fuck me and wouldn't take "No" for an answer.  We fought some more. I realized I had to stay as close to the door as possible and not allow him to push me to the floor or towards the back of the room.

Then I got angry.....I grabbed him by the neck by one hand and started kicking the door repeatedly so people outside could hear something was wrong.  He was using one of his hands to block the door lock so I couldn't unlock it.  I started yelling in Cantonese, "let me get out...!!"  He started making loud wailing noises like a deaf guy does, and fighting with me with his fist.

I finally got his hand off the door lock, unlocked it, opened the door and kicked the door into him, forcing him into a corner.  He was wailing loudly and hitting the door in anger.

I was out of the room and in the Dark Area corridor.  There were people standing around looking at me and muttering to each other.  Nobody came forward to ask if I was OK.  I wasn't.  I pointed to the room and said in Cantonese, "that guy is dangerous, be careful".

I was sweating, my heart was racing and I had scratches on me.  It wasn't until I got to the Locker Area and looked in the mirror that I saw the scratches on my face.  I was horrified and pissed off.  I had a shower, got dressed and left.

WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO TELL MY PARENTS WHEN THEY SEE THE SCRATCHES ON MY FACE.....??!!  THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW I'M GAY...!!  HOW CAN I EXPLAIN THIS TO THEM..??!!  IT'S SO OBVIOUS I'VE BEEN IN A FIGHT.....!!  I CAN'T MAKE A REPORT TO THE POLICE WITHOUT DISCLOSING WHERE IT HAPPENED AND OUTING MYSELF.

WHAT AM I GONNA DO WHEN I GET HOME..??!!  I'M NOT READY TO COME OUT TO MY PARENTS...I'M JUST NOT...!!  HOW CAN I TELL THEM THAT I'M GAY AND SOME GUY TRIED TO RAPE ME..??!!  THEY WILL THROW ME OUT...!!  I KNOW THEY WILL...!!

FM:  [remains silent, not knowing what to say]

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What Is PrEP.....? 4

COMPLETED 30 DECEMBER 2016

Q: What is PrEP?
A: ‘PrEP’ stands for Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, an anti-HIV medication that can help stop HIV-negative people from getting infected by HIV even if they are exposed to HIV. Using the drugs Truvada (tenofovir and emtricitabine formulate) as its components, the medicine can prevent HIV from making new virus as it enters the body and keep the virus from establishing a permanent infection. Please note that PrEP is not a vaccine that produces HIV antibody in the body, and it needs to be used consistently over time to reduce the risk of acquiring HIV. Taking one pill before high risk sex will not protect you. 

 
Q: Is PrEP effective in preventing HIV?
A: Yes if used properly. PrEP is proved to be effective in reducing the risk of acquiring HIV through sex when used consistently with strict adherence. According to the iPrEx clinical study by the US Department of Health and Human Services in 2011, the risk of HIV acquisition was reduced by as much as 96%-99% (CI: 86%-100%) among men who have sex with men (MSM) who adhered well to PrEP. Studies show that daily doses of PrEP also reduced HIV transmission among heterosexual serodiscordant couples (in which one partner is infected with HIV and the other is not) by 75%. 
Please note that the effectiveness of PrEP is highly contingent on the degree of drug adherence of the user. One needs to adhere strictly to the drug regimen to reduce the risk of acquiring HIV.
AIDS Concern is advocating for PrEP to become available in Hong Kong for people at high risk of HIV and in particular for demonstration projects in Hong Kong. Please click here for AIDS Concern’s advocacy position.

 
Q: Am I suitable for this medication? Do I need to use condoms as well?
A: The USA Centre for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and World Health Organization (WHO) recommend PrEP for people who are HIV-negative and at substantial risk for HIV infection. The World Health Organisation recommends that PrEP should be one additional option for HIV prevention, but did not recommend it to be a substitute for condoms. Although PrEP is already highly effective in preventing HIV infections, there are by far a few reported cases where people who adhere to PrEP have become HIV positive. It should be noted that PrEP is a biomedical intervention measure, and it may have limitations in preventing HIV-virus that are already resistant to Truvada. Therefore, people using PrEP should also continue using condoms when having sex to ensure low risk of HIV and also other sexually-transmitted diseases. People who take PrEP should also have HIV and STI testing every 3 months and receive close monitoring of their medication adherence and risk behaviors regularly. 


Q: Does PrEP have side-effects? 
A: Side effects vary from person to person. Short term side-effects include headaches, weight loss, diarrhoea, nausea, and fatigue. Long-term side effects such as kidney dysfunction and decreased bone mineral density do affect a very small proportion of PrEP users. This is why medical supervision and follow up tests are important.

In PrEP studies, use of tenofovir has been associated with small decreases in key measures of kidney function (creatinine clearance and glomerular filtration rate, GFR) and 0.4-1.5% loss in bone mineral density, affecting up to 2% of participants. However, most of their renal function and bone mineral density was also found to have returned to the baseline level after withdrawing PrEP use. 
PrEP users are advised to have their health conditions continuously monitored when taking PrEP, and consult their doctors when necessary. 


Q: Is there a possibility of developing drug resistance?
A: As Truvada is also commonly used in antiretroviral treatment for HIV positive people, some people are worried that PrEP users would develop drug resistance to Truvada which could make HIV treatment ineffective if they become HIV-positive in the future. 

Among the 9222 users who have taken on PrEP in trials, only 11 people developed FTC or TDF-resistant HIV infection (n=0.1%), and it occurred mainly among people who were already acutely infected with HIV before initiating PrEP. In other words, if PrEP users do not adhere well to the drug regimen and engage in high risk behavior at the same time, unrecognized and acute HIV infection would expose them to the risk of developing drug resistance when they continue on taking PrEP. 

In order to avoid the risk of developing drug resistance, PrEP users should adhere strictly to the drug regimen suggested by the doctor, and have initial and regular HIV testing to be consistently aware of their HIV status. 


Q: How can I use PrEP to effectively prevent HIV?
A: You should take PrEP daily—take one pill of Truvada each day consistently. It takes 7-20 days for the different body parts to build up the drug concentration to prevent HIV depending on what type of sexual intercourse you are having.

Some people are taking PrEP before and after sex. This approach needs to be handled carefully as it takes time for the drug to get to an optimal protection level for your body. People considering this approach should discuss it seriously with their doctor. 


Q: Is PrEP available in Hong Kong?
A: PrEP is not yet available in the public health system in Hong Kong. Some private doctors are prescribing but the cost is quite high, which is priced at approximately $8000 to $10000 a month. If you want to get PrEP privately please contact AIDS Concern by telephoning 2898 4411 so that we can advise you on possible clinics.

AIDS Concern is advocating for PrEP to become available through the public health system. Other options are to access PrEP by visiting the Red Cross clinic in Bangkok. However, we strongly recommend you read the information about these options later in this information sheet before considering either of those options. Getting medication like PrEP without medical supervision can be dangerous for your health.


Q: Some people are going to Thailand to get PrEP. Is this a good idea?
A: There are a number of providers in Thailand advertising PrEP. However, if you want to access PrEP it is important that you do so from a legitimate supplier where you get the necessary medical checks to ensure that you are safe to take the medication. One reputable supplier is the Thai Red Cross Research Centre which has a Prep-30 project. Another clinic which provides PrEP is Sathorn International Clinic. This does require you to go to Bangkok. Please see the links here if you would like to learn more:

http://www.adamslove.org/en-d.php?id=429
http://www.sathornclinic.com/hiv-std/prep/ 

It should be noted that the importation of pharmaceutical products and medicine are controlled under the Import and Export Ordinance (Cap. 60), thus must be covered by a license issued by Department of Health under delegated authority of the Director-General of Trade and Industry Department. Pharmaceutical products and medicines imported in the personal baggage of a person entering Hong Kong and which are accompanied by him and in a reasonable quantity for his personal use may be exempted from licensing requirement. People who are going overseas to get access to PrEP are therefore strongly advised to keep a medical certificate provided by the prescribing doctor with themselves when they have to bring PrEP to Hong Kong for personal use. 

You may call the Drug Office of Department of Health (Tel.: 2319 8460) for enquiries relating to import/export of pharmaceutical products and medicine or Customs and Excise Department (Tel.: 2815 7711) for general enquiry on Customs clearance.

 
Q: I would like to buy PrEP from the internet. Is this a good idea?
A: Buying medication over the internet is a bad idea unless you can be sure that the supplier is legitimate. Otherwise there is a risk that you may be given fake pills that do not work or which cause you harm. It is also important that anyone being prescribed PrEP has medical supervision for this to happen. 


Q: I’ve decided to take PrEP. What do I need to pay heed to? 
A: If you do decide to take PrEP, please remember these 3 crucial factors:

– When you start using PrEP, you must absolutely be sure that you do not have HIV to avoid the risk of drug resistance. Get tested at AIDS Concern or Social Hygiene Clinic for free. You may also go to a private clinic for testing;
– Have your blood checked first to ensure that your kidney and liver functions are alright; and
– Get tested every 3 months for HIV and other STIs, and have your kidney and liver functions regularly monitored through your doctor. 

-----PrEP Fact Sheet, AIDS Concern, Hong Kong

What Is PrEP...? 3

4.  Gay Men Bragging In The Sauna That They're On PrEP

FuelMix at the sauna here in Very Rich Megacity, chatting to a 20-something Thai MuscleBoy visiting town for a few days:

TMB:  ...I shouldn't keep doing this...I keep telling myself to stop...but it never works

FM:  Stop doing what..?

TMB:  Fucking bareback...I just love it!! I can't stop..!!

FM:  How long you in town for?

TMB:  3 days....I've spent it in different saunas, 2 in a day.  I've been to Hutong twice, Big Top twice, My Way once and now this one. So yeah...6 saunas in 3 days.  I leave early tomorrow morning, so I'll probably spend the night here and sleep on the plane.

FM:  How many guys have you fucked bareback over the last 3 days..?

TMB:  Well, I got action about 4 times in each sauna, each time I showed up, so...about 17 so far plus the two I fucked bareback at this place.  I'll be hanging here overnight, so I'll probably fuck another 2 or 3.  Maybe 20 guys in 3 days...something like that.

FM:  That's impressive barebacking.  I noticed you like showing off to a crowd while you're fucking...

TMB:  Yeah...just love showing off my body... I mean I work out in the gym so yeah, I like to show it off..... I was in Singapore, Pattaya and Bangkok on this trip, before I came to Hong Kong.  Then I head home to Canada.

FM:  Did you hit the saunas in those cities too..?

TMB:  That's all I did!![grins]...3 or 4 days in each place, sometimes over 12 hours in the sauna...fucking bareback. I'm guessing maybe I fucked 8 to 10 guys each day.  It's much easier to get action in the saunas in Bangkok, Pattaya and Singapore then it is here.  Hong Kong guys have too much shitty attitude.

FM:  So...that would be about 100 guys you fucked bareback over the last 10 days before you dropped into Hong Kong - PLUS the 2 you've fucked here so far...PLUS another 2 or 3 that you might do overnight....that would be about 105 guys bareback in 14 days...??!!

TMB:  Ya...pretty amazing  huh..?  I'm not bullshitting. I'm addicted to barebacking!!  I got TONS of bareback group action in Bangkok, Pattaya and Singapore. And I'm a Top and there's no shortage of guys wanting to be fucked.

FM:  You're not worried about your health..?

TMB:  Nah...I'm protected...I use PrEP you know.  Prevents me getting HIV.

FM:  Oh...did you get it by prescription in Canada..?

TMB:  Nah....I am from Thailand. It is easier for me to go there because buying PrEP in Thailand is a lot cheaper.  I take a prescription from my doctor in Canada and can get it in Bangkok and some other cities in Thailand.  I can get a 3 month prescription that I take daily.  I have a doctor in Thailand and in Canada and get tested in both places.  But Thailand is a lot cheaper so I prefer to buy there.

FM:  What about bringing the PrEP you bought in Thailand back into Canada?  Any problems at the airport..?

TMB:  Nah...because I am carrying the doctors' prescriptions.  They ask questions and I show them. They don't hassle me.

FM:   So you take one PrEP once a day and fuck bareback at every sauna you hit.  But you're fucking a lot of guys bareback...even if you're on PrEP, you're not even a little worried that your barebacking is out of control..?

TMB:  I'm totally addicted to barebacking.  Sometimes I worry for a little while after I've fucked a cute guy in the sauna....and then I see another cute guy wandering around and I'm fucking him, coming in his ass or mouth....I dunno.....maybe I fuck too much.....I can't help myself....I try and cut it down.....I just can't.

FM:  PrEP may protect you against HIV, but it doesn't protect you against other infections like Syphilis or Chlamydia or Gonorrhea...

TMB:  Yeah I know.....I've had that stuff several times...fuck...hurts like hell..!!

FM:  So...you could have taken PrEP plus antibiotics for a sexual infection at the same time..?

TMB:  Yeah...and Viagra.  When the infection finishes, I take PrEP and Viagra daily.  I am really into multiple barebacking...to me a hard body and a hard cock... it's just awesome...but maybe later I will cut it back...I dunno

FM:  I'm guessing the Viagra is from Thailand as well

TMB:  [grins]...yeah, everything is cheaper in Thailand

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What Is PrEP..? 2

3.  Gay Men Announcing Their PrEP Use Online
4.  Gay Men Bragging About PrEP In The Saunas 


3.  Gay Men Announcing Their PrEP Use Online

1.   Over the last few months, here in Very Rich Megacity, (and we suspect elsewhere in Western cities with high concentrations of gay men) we've spotted online profiles on Craigslist, chatrooms, escort sites and phone apps where guys seeking M2M hookups gave their stats, a pic and a statement that they were - and are - on PrEP.  

2.   In several cases the guys have gone further by announcing when they were last checked for STD's (Sexually Transmitted Diseases), their current STD, status - AND that they have their latest STD certificate which they are prepared to show. (In some cases, demanding reciprocal disclosure).

3.   Let's be more precise and put it into context.  The hookup ads that we saw were from Western tourists visiting Very Rich Megacity.  They would have obtained PrEP by prescription from doctors in their home countries.

4.   Unless we've missed something, whilst PrEP has been available in Very Rich Megacity since 2014, as at May 2016, PrEP is only available by prescription in private clinics - at a cost of HK$8,500.00 - HK$10,000.00 (US1,080.00 and up) for one month's supply.  The cost is not covered by government subsidy and is not covered by private medical insurance.   That explains why it isn't the local GAMs mentioning PrEP in their online profiles.  They can't afford it. Period.

5.   Let's put it into context again.  In this city, buying a slice of Viagra (under the counter without a prescription) costs about HK$300.00.  Cut it in half and you can get double the mileage.


COMING UP IN PART 3:

4.  Gay Men Bragging About PrEP In The Saunas 
 

 

What Is PrEP..? 1

• .....and why are gay men announcing in their online profiles that they're taking it..?
• .....and why are gay men bragging about it in the saunas..?
• (.....and why are some doctors allegedly refusing to prescribe it to gay men...?) 

1.   Slick Advertising
2.   All The Right Buzzwords 
3.  Gay Men Announcing Their PrEP Use Online
4.  Gay Men Bragging About PrEP In The Saunas


1.   Slick Advertising





2.  All The Right Buzz Words...

(underlining and bold print by FuelMix):

  

"A once a day pill that keeps you HIV negative

Why PrEP?

PrEP allows guys to be in control of their HIV status.  Control means more confidence all round.

PrEP provides around the clock protection against HIV.  When you take PrEP once a day, you are always protected.

PrEP relieves stress and anxiety that can be associated with sex.  When you're with that special guy, PrEP allows you to connect and be in the moment.

Neg or Poz, we all share responsibility for HIV prevention.  With PrEP negative guys have an additional tool that they can use to proactively be in control of their HIV status.  When PrEP is in the equation, positive guys can be confident that their partners are well protected."

-----EndingHIV.org.au

COMING UP IN PART 2:

3.  Gay Men Announcing Their PrEP Use Online
4.  Gay Men Bragging About PrEP In The Saunas