Dead Man Dancing

1.  The Mega-Gay Dance Parties
2.  Gay Dance Parties Signalling Their Virtue
3.  Gay Media Message On HIV/AIDS Ambiguous 
4.  The Hook Of The Gay Dance Parties
5.  "Manageability"

1.  The Mega-Gay Dance Parties 

1.  There’s no shortage of gay media coverage of the mega-gay dance parties and raves held around the rainbow universe. Ski Week, Fleet Week, White Party, Black And Blue Party, Pride Week etc. Not only do they serve as circuit pilgrimages – the Fag Haj where the recently converted meet the faithful, the faithful meet the true believers and the true believers meet the High Queens and DJ Gods – but they also attract fag celebs, porn stars, porn talent scouts and the assorted ass trash that passes as a wannabe’s entourage.

2.  It’s easy to get swept up in the whole thing – the non-stop partying, the crush of sweaty guys, the dizzying array of bulging muscle, the slick dance moves, that relentless beat, the strobes, losing all sense of time, the blowjobs on the dancefoor – and the chemical and amphetamine canapés so generously offered as communion.


2.  Gay Dance Parties Signalling Their Virtue

1.  Many gay mega-dance parties loudly tout that a portion of their proceeds will go for AIDS care. Sounds hunky dory right..? Until it gets put into context.


3.  Gay Media Message On HIV/AIDS Ambiguous

1.  The gay media message about HIV/AIDS is ambiguous and ambivalent. It has 3 concurrent streams:

2.  First, there was no sign of a vaccine. Now we're told one's either available, or very shortly will be.

3.  Second, AIDS is “manageable” via a smorgasbord of medication. The term “manageable” infuriates FuelMix. It’s a politically correct synonym for coping at less than optimum levels with something chronic. It ignores the wretched physical anguish that accompanies AIDS. Insidiously, it perpetuates the acceptability of human suffering via polite nomenclature. FuelMix has more to say about “manageable” further on in this post.

4.  Third, fags are getting infected at much earlier ages.


4.  The Hook Of The Gay Dance Parties

1.  Gay mega-dance parties are tons of fun. But the warm and fuzzy feeling that fags get by being told that a portion of the proceeds go for AIDS and HIV, are offset by the entrenched culture of drug-taking at those parties. Those drugs are consumed for the sole purpose of evaporating inhibitions and making the fag more sexual. The impaired judgment leads to unsafe practices and the fag gets infected.

2.  So the gay rave is not only a rite of passage, but also a viral roulette game to bet on whether the fag makes it from Twink to Thirty.

3.  But consider this. FuelMix hasn’t seen very much being done about fags and their drug addictions. Why? Because fags have convinced themselves that they are “recreational drug users”. Ergo, there’s no problem.

4.  So, the commonly seen drug-fucked sexual judgment at gay raves is the product that keeps the raves in business, attracts thousands of fags, and provides the perfect opportunity for organizers and sponsors to market their altruistic side by doling out a bit for HIV and AIDS while ignoring the drug issue.

5.  Therefore, the link between addiction and infection becomes extremely profitable and politically correct.


5.  "Manageability"

1.  Back to the issue of “manageability”. Note the similarity between taking a drug cocktail for HIV/AIDS and taking a drug cocktail at raves. Both are for manageability. One is for managing survival. The other is for managing escapism.

Let’s get one thing perfectly clear. FuelMix has nothing against mega-gay raves and after-parties (other than cringing at the idea of being seen downtown in club wear and glow sticks at 8 am by his alarmed office buddies in suits and briefcases).

See also:

• Dead Man Talking.
• Rainbow High

Originally published 9 January 2009
Amended and Republished 2 July 2013 | 6 August 2018 

Copyright © 2006 – 2018 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Gay Filipinos.....It's OK To Be Filipino

If there's one trait that identifies gay Filipinos (or Flips as they refer to themselves) outside the Philippines, it's their acute embarrassment at being Filipino.

For a nation whose main exports are mangoes, bananas, domestic helpers, hotel staff, cruise ship workers, janitors, nurses, whores, bar waitresses, nightclub musicians and theme park dancers, the embarrassment might be understandable - notwithstanding that these hardworking people remit tons of money back to the Philippines to help their families.

But in Fagland, where ethnicity is a touchy subject, being a gay Filipino outside your own country, is taken to deceptive extremes.  So deceptive that the average Flip fag will grab any nationality other than his own. They can range from anything from Thai, to Malay, to "Asian-Spanish" (that description is particularly favoured on the West Coast) to "Latin American" (dicey and risks being equated to ugly Hondurans) all the way to "Asian-Latin" (which in FuelMix's book, is pretty much, "WTF"...?)

The Philippines has a history of Spanish colonialism, a lot of Flips have Spanish names and the Vatican just loves their out-of-control, 5th World breeding that guarantees new recruits for their religious Ponzi scheme.  Granted some (apparently lighter-skinned) Flips have Spanish blood in them just like many really black niggas have white blood in them, but......just how many niggas go around claiming to be White Niggas...?

Is there an assumed paella-scented cachet in the gay Filipino describing himself as "Asian-Spanish" instead of the lumpia-snarfing "Filipino"..?  Is "Thai" or "Malay" assumed to be more attractive than "Filipino"..?  Is there a quest for a gay nationality less janitorial than "Filipino"..?

What gives...?  We love these guys.  They keep smiling from ear to ear.  What pain are they hiding..?

Do gay Filipinos suffer from collective internal loathing about their nationality..?

FuelMix recalls being cruised online by a Flip fag who approached 3 times in the space of a few mnutes, each time with a different nationality:

• "Asian-Spanish";
• "Malay";
• "Asian";

How did FuelMix know the fag was a Flip..? 'Coz he spoke to him on the phone and flushed it out of him.  The dude was both embarrassed and relieved that he'd been Outed as a Filipino.  No hookup took place.

It's laughable, but deeply pathetic since that online trait is mirrored in real life by Filpinos, especially in the saunas in this city.  Stop dancing around your nationality.  Spit it out and take it like a man.

So what if your country's main exports are its people...?  Without Filipinos, large chunks of the world's economy would come to a grinding halt.  You guys are more of an economic force than you realize and the unsung heroes of so much of what non-Filipinos take for granted.

Remind FuelMix again what Gay Pride is all about...?

See also Frustrated, Fat, Gay Filipino

Originally published 2 March 2010
Amended and Republished 4 August 2018 

Copyright © 2006 – 2018 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Spasmodic Autism

Fag places an online ad, or hangs his dick and torso on an app. Other fags respond, pics and all. Then, chat room window or talk bubble on the app goes ominously quiet.  No acknowledgement. 

Zip. Zero. Nada. 

A culture of silence and cover up, worthy of a sequel to the Da Vinci Code, and just as ungodly. Why is that...?

FuelMix has already referred to the generic inability of ghetto fags to properly confront almost any situation. See the post, Avoidance And Aversion. Sadly, ignoring responses, is far more widespread.

Fags argue that placing an online ad is like sitting at a bar – you’re gonna attract attention, some of which you don’t want and therefore, ignoring is legitimate and part of the online game. 

Bullshit. 

The analogy is completely false. The fag is the one who placed the ad seeking attention and often, expressly inviting a response right down to a specific type of guy, ethnicity, dick size, date, time and place. How many fags do you know sashaying into a bar with stats and an ultimatum of preference and place written across their foreheads...?

Other fags say that there’s no need to respond to those you don’t want, because the game is an online casino. You come in, play, take your chances. 

Agreed – but walk into any casino in Vegas or Macau, not only will you see whether you’ve won or lost, but the hostess at the gaming table will tell you up front.

Some fags say they don’t want to hurt people’s feelings. 

Oh please. 

Whether it’s a single e-mail response that is left hanging, or, back and forth e-mails or chat on an app, that suddenly collapse without the courtesy of a reason, silence is a cop out and reeks of sly cowardice. The damage has already been done - often with assumed, or actual unspoken malice.

Those fags who deliberately ignore a response to their ad, should apply for disability and special needs. FuelMix would also like to see a handicapped sticker next to their online ads.

Hence the title of this post.

What makes it even more astonishing is that those readers now in their 20s who were just kids when this post was originally published in 2006, are the newest generation of fucked-up flakes with attitude.

See also what FuelMix wrote about "Ghosting", in the post, Beaming Myself Out, Fag. 
 

Originally published 20 May 2006
Amended and Republished 3 August 2018

Copyright © 2006 – 2018 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Adultery

To:

Those gay men who claim to be married or have a boyfriend, or claim to be, or think they are, in a relationship, but are sleeping around:

• with consent of the other partner;
• with the assumed consent of the other partner;  
• without the consent of their partner;
• without disclosing or discussing what they're up to;
• on the basis of "don't ask, don't tell";
• assuming their partner is also sleeping around;
• or just flat out lying about what they're up to;

we present the comments of Sadhguru.  Speaking in perfect English, with the option of English subtitles.  Running time: 6 minutes.



To ensure the correct video loads, refresh the page
Copyright in the video vests in the lawful copyright holders

See also the posts:  

1. Yeah I'm Straight
2. Open Season
3. The Vow
4. The Pact
5. And The Band Stayed On
6. Bi-furcation
7. For Better, For Worse Or Whatever
8. An Ideal.....Compromised 
9. Shot Through The Heart 

Copyright © 2006 – 2018 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Gay Men And Forgiveness 2

It’s not difficult to find a gay man who has been hurt by another gay man. 

Sure, there might be different degrees of hurt. Some offenses were probably more subtle, while others were more blatant and outward. Regardless, they all can leave a mark. 

The reality is that many gay men are carrying past hurt with them day in and day out. The experience and wound gets re-opened each time they think about the look, insult or slur that was thrown their way. Instead of healing, the wound gets sliced open over and over again. 

On the other side, there are gay men out there who continue to hurt other gay men. Their view of the world is narrow and self-absorption is a way of life. Their self is the center of the world and they swing violently throughout the bars, beaches and community, much like a wrecking ball (cue Miley Cyrus). 

All of this creates a recipe for long-lasting grudges, cycles of hurt and monumental barriers to forming a sense of community among gay men. 

Is this presence of skepticism, paranoia and suspicion of gay men toward other gay men an old phenomenon? Or is this new? Is it something that wasn’t ever talked about or acknowledged before or are we facing a brand new beast? 

What I don’t hear a lot within the gay community is the concept of forgiveness. 

Merriam-Webster says to forgive is to “stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong)” and “to stop blaming (someone).” To “stop feeling anger about (something) and “to forgive someone for (something wrong)”. 

While there are certainly pockets and moments of love shown between gay men, there is also burning rage in the hearts of many — especially those who have been hurt time and again. 

Both Martin Luther King, Jr. and Mahatma Gandhi spoke strongly about forgiving others. King said, “We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.” And Gandhi boldly proclaimed, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong”. 

It’s safe to say that most gay men have been hurt by other gay men at some point in their lives. What would it look like for you to forgive the gay men that have hurt you in your life? Is it possible for you to let go of that hurt you’ve been carrying around for days weeks, months or even decades? Do you believe reconciliation is even possible? 

Maybe forgiveness is a muscle we’ve allowed to get flabby and weak. Maybe we’ve been holding out for an apology from our perpetrator that may never arrive. The truth is that when we refuse to forgive others, we only imprison ourselves. 

Every gay man reading this gets to decide: Will I carry anger or love in my heart? You can’t carry both. 

Yes, we need to educate our fellow gay men and be bold in confronting racism, classism, ageism and other -isms that too often go unaddressed in our community. 

I fear, however, that without an element of forgiveness, our posture toward one another will continue to harden. The distance and divide will increase and the toxic words we throw toward one another will become increasingly sharp and pointed. 

There’s very little hope of cultivating community and friendships when we can’t stand one another and when we won’t forgive. 

Forgiveness is messy. It’s complicated. Maybe we’re afraid to air our “dirty laundry” to the larger world. If we’re real honest with ourselves, gay men are not at all immune to hating one another. Perhaps a part of you hates other gay men in this very moment. 

While writing this, I came across these powerful words from Archbishop Desmond Tutu:

Forgiving and being reconciled to our enemies or our loved ones are not about pretending that things are other than they are. It is not about patting one another on the back and turning a blind eye to the wrong. True reconciliation exposes the awfulness, the abuse, the hurt, the truth. It could even sometimes make things worse. It is a risky undertaking, but in the end it is worthwhile, because in the end, only an honest confrontation with reality can bring real healing. Superficial reconciliation can bring only superficial healing.

Will gay men step forward to choose forgiveness? Will I? Will you? What will be your first step toward forgiving your fellow gay men?..................


-----"What If Gay Men Forgave One Another?",  by Josh Hersh, July 17, 2014, The Blog, Huffington Post 

See also: Gay Men And Forgiveness 1

Daddy Issues

When you hear someone refer to “Daddy Issues”, there’s always a negative connotation to the conversation. All my life I’ve heard this reference while secretly the topic made sense to me and excited me. I was thinking how wonderful it was to want a Daddy in my life-never agreeing with the surrounding negative comments about this topic. It has taken me years of secrecy and self analysis to accept, embrace and love my inner “boy” that will exist until the day I die.

So yeah, I grew up with a dad that was distant, never paid me attention and never showed me affection.. much less love.

At age 11 or 12, I went on a hunting trip with an uncle and I got lots of attention from his buddies and I was immediately in love with them.

They were MEN, blue-collar, hairy, muscular, truck driving, whiskey drinking, foul-mouthed MEN. The minute I got into a pick up truck with three of them I felt the instant attraction. I remember later that night in my own bed thinking about them and wishing they would have kept me and take me to live with them. I couldn’t stop thinking about those Alpha Men.

The first time I jerked off I thought of a woman, the second time I thought about theMen in the hunting cabin, and my orgasm was 100 Xs more intense.

My first orgasm at age 11or 12 I was thinking about the Men I had met on the hunting trip. From that day on all I could think about was those MEN, those muscled hairy Alpha Men hat talked dirty, hung out together half naked in the hunting cabin , drank a lot and oozed testosterone. I had never been around any thing like this. And suddenly everything instantly clicked in my head that I could belong to them. I can’t explain the feeling of suddenly fitting in or feeling at home or or the planets aligning, but suddenly everything made sense about my feelings.

After that trip, all I could think about was trying to get their attention and do anything to make those MEN happy. I was obsessed with seeing them again and making them smile and feel good. I went from thinking about playing with my friends and baseball after school to just obsessing about taking care of those MEN. I have this uncontrollable urge to please them, and I didn’t know how or what to do but I couldn’t get rid of the urge to do anything for them that they would ask of me.

Then I started masturbating…… And my active imagination came up with ways to put a smile on those faces, and ways to make those MEN feel good and ways to please them.. With no knowledge of how to have sex, I instinctually started thinking about submitting to them, being on my knees and nursing on their cocks like a baby on a milk bottle. I’ve never felt as in sync with the universe as I did when I started imagining me servicing those Alphas. The thought of sucking off Men and getting all of my nourishment from them was as natural as breathing. ( see my blog “ Participate In The Big Cum Experiment”)

So yes, I love my Daddy issues. Discovering that part of myself led to me knowing myself like I never have before. I realized that I was born to please MEN, there is nothing that is a satisfying for me as giving everything to a MAN.Anything you can think of that would please HIM, my body, my money, my hole, my mouth, my throat, anything that would satisfy him I am willing to give.

It’s time we embrace our daddy issues, so we can rightfully and proudly take our place as submissive boys in the world and that take care of, support and worship the MEN around us. The ones that choose us as their own need us too, I consider myself very lucky to have been used as a boy for Some amazing Alphas, most of them active duty military men.

So let’s start thinking of daddy issues as a good thing, let’s use it n a positive contexts, make boys proud to raise their hand and offer themselves to the MEN that need use. I am proud to submit to, service and please the MEN in my life.

And to the wonderful Alphas out there, thank a Dad for giving us our “Daddy Issues,”

-----"The Great Thing About Daddy Issues", sub-fag-cocksucker-for-alphas.tumblr.com

 WARNING:  Blog quoted above is NSFW
 

Tai Kwun

10 Hollywood Road
Central
Hong Kong

• MTR Central Station Exit D1: Come out on Pedder Street, turn right on to Queen’s Road Central and walk west until reaching Cochrane Street. Then take the stairs to join the Mid-Levels Escalators.  On the corner of Hollywood and Old Bailey Street, there is a footbridge extending from the escalator that connects directly to one of the entrances of  Tai Kwun above Old Bailey Street.  That entrance is known as Footbridge Gate.
• MTR Hong Kong Station Exit E: Come out of IFC and take the elevated pedestrian walkway over Connaught Road Central.  Walk past  Hang Seng Bank Head office, through the Central Market Building and then join the Mid-Levels Escalators to enter Tai Kwun.  On the corner of Hollywood Road and Old Bailey Street, there is a footbridge extending from the escalator that connects directly to one of the entrances of Tai Kwun above Old Bailey Street.  That entrance is known as Footbridge Gate

Web: taikwun.hk
Opening Hours: 11am - 11pm (Visitors Centre 8pm. Shops may close earlier) 



Tai Kwun opened in June 2018 and is the centre for heritage, arts, shopping and dining.  It occupies the site of three important colonial-era buildings:  the restored former Central Police Station, Central Magistracy and Victoria Prison.

It is very easy to locate since it's a huge colonial site on Hollywood Road.  It's also easy to get into with 5 pedestrian gates open to the public:

1. Bauhinia House Gate on Arbuthnot Road;
2. Blue Gate at the top of Old Bailey Street;
3. Footbridge Gate at the bottom of and above, Old Bailey Street;
4. Old Bailey Gate at street level on Old Bailey Street;
5. Pottinger Gate at the top of the Pottinger Street Steps;

And you fags are gonna love this place.....

• It's a great place to sit, sip, nibble and people watch (trust us, we've done it);
• It's a great place to window shop and shop (trust us, we've done it)
• It's a great place to eat (trust us, we've done it);
• It's a great place to just **ahem** wander around not knowing which hottie you might run into (trust us, we've done it);
• It's a great place to pose (trust us, we've done it);
• It's a great place to ask a cute stranger to take pics of you, then start a conversation which you can take to one of the outside tables and continue over a snack and a drink (trust us, we've done it)
• It's a great place to make eye contact (trust us, we've done it);
• There are plenty of toilets........in case you need to fix your makeup and comb your hair; (we'll let you fill in the blanks on that one);

Truth is, although very few people will say it publicly, Hollywood Road area is very gay-centric.

We're not just talking about that asylum for gay whites, Central Escalator.  The reality is one can make eye contact or get cruised just by walking along Hollywood Road from exploring Tai Kwun to exploring PMQ (which we've written about previously) to the notorious Sun Yat Sen Steps on Shing Wong Street and the "facilities". Those "facilities" are so famous that (not only have they been the repeated subject of Craigslist hookups) one of the married elderly male cleaning staff are in on it - and will  make "customer recommendations"........

We didn't believe it when our friendly GAM-Throats-On-The-Street told us about the staff at the Sun Yat Sen Steps going over and above the call of duty.  Then we showed up and sure enough, the elderly male attendant was "very friendly" pointing out who's who and saying FuelMix should have no trouble finding "friends".  We giggled like hell.

It's these sharp portraits of Very Rich Megacity that make living here such a joy.

For another example of what happened to FuelMix at a public toilet, check out the post, PPnP (Pee, Porn and Preview).

We do not encourage any illegal behaviour.  We simply report what we've seen and experienced.


Copyright © 2006 – 2018 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Romancing The Bone

How Faggotry Manufactures Gayness to Devastating Effect

1.  The Setup
2.  Technique 1 - Massive Flattery And Adoration
3.  Technique 2 - Gay By Implication
4.  Technique 3 - Disprove The Negative: Prove You're Not Gay
5.  So...What's The Point...?
6.  Faggotry As A Predator
7.  The Independently Thinking Gay Man


1.   The Setup

It starts with gay or gay-focused sites or blogs. While some may feature hard and soft core male porn as the hook, the real objects of attention fall into distinct categories:

1. Male pop stars - particularly those in their 20s or early 30s;
2. Male TV actors - initially it started with those in daytime soap operas, but expanded to include those appearing on prime time;
3. Male models - in particular underwear and swimwear models with billboard, magazine or online exposure, erotic photography models;
4. Male athletes or Olympic athletes - preferred sports for attention being swimming, diving, sprinters, gymnasts, figure skating (but now expanding to include soccer and rugby players);
5. Male fitness models and bodybuilders;
6. Male celebrities;
7. Guys appearing in gay-for-pay porn or bi porn;

2.   Technique 1 - Massive Flattery and Adoration 

1.   The "target" male becomes the subject of intensely positive reportage, starting with his physical characteristics and sometimes includes an "awww...." factor to make it easier to relate to him:

• cute dimples;
• great smile;
• lovely eyes;
• chic haircut;
• handsome face that makes one swoon;
• body to die for;
• superficial titillating speculation e.g. does his hairy chest lead to a treasure trail on his lower abs...? is he Cut or Uncut...? Given that bulge in his swimming trunks or underwear, how many inches could he be....?
• detailed stats including place and date of birth;
• tall, dark and handsome or blue-eyed, wholesome jock next door;
• exotic masculine looks especially if coupled with mixed heritage;
• "analysis" of muscle definition with emphasis on particular muscle groups e.g. rippling biceps, massive shoulders, defined V-shape in the back, really powerful thighs, cute muscled butt;
• superficial speculation on his work-out routine, gossip about which gym he goes to and what times he can be spotted there, who his trainer is;
• what size clothes he wears and his favourite colours;
• "Awww...." factors include: loves dogs, likes playing frisbee, pigs out on cheeseburgers and tacos; sleeps in on Sundays, does volunteer work.......

2.   What's the point of Faggotry laying it on thick....?  Simple.  The first step is to let the "target" know he has a gay following.  That's both a blessing and a curse.

3.   The moment that "target" goes public via social media or a magazine or TV interview that he's so "honoured / happy / thrilled / pleasantly surprised" that he has a gay following, Faggotry has got him.  The first stage has been entirely successful. They've got his attention. It's time for Faggotry to move to the next stage against him - or look for another target.

4.   Alternatively, Techniques 1 and 2 (below) can be combined.  The desired result is the same.....it puts the "target" on the defensive, first via a Charm Offensive and then by something progressively more sinister.


3.   Technique 2 - Gay By Implication

1.   How the "target" male is softened up by implication and innuendo:

• His Church is the gym;
• When he's not alone, he's only and always seen with guys;
• Those guys are rumoured to be gay;
• Those guys have been seen with other guys known or suspected to be gay;
• The women in his social life are all platonic friends;
• Hangs around with known "fag hags"; 
• Seen in gay-friendly bars, cafes and restaurants with "fag hags";
• Spotted in the crowd at Gay Pride alone or with one or more of the above;
• Shows no inclination to date women, even though women find him attractive;
• Coy about the women in his life and deflects questioning;
• Lives with or is close to his Mom;
• Lives with his "roomate" and has been for a couple of years;
• Wears body conscious clothing;
• Wears brands favoured by gay customers;
• Shops in retail stores frequented by gay customers;
• Body accessories indicative of "gayness" e.g. earring or stud in Right Ear, jewellery by gay designer;
• Had his apartment remodelled by a trendy gay designer;
• Socializes with known gay celebs and gay media types either publicly or at swanky private parties;
• Circumstantial or direct evidence that he showed up at gay saunas or cruising areas;
• Circumstantial or direct evidence that he came on to one or more guys;

4.   Technique 3 - Disprove The Negative : Prove You're Not Gay

1.   There's been a ton of stuff written in the fields of Religion, Philosophy and Logic about the apparent futility or possibility of Disproving a Negative.  Google it.

2.   It's also a favourite geopolitical tool of the West when it comes to intimidating, threatening or attacking a foreign country - often on trumped up "evidence".  The 2003 attack on Iraq was based entirely on false evidence of the alleged presence of weapons of mass destruction coupled with a demand that the Iraqi government show that it didn't have them.  It was deliberately intended to back them into a corner because whatever they said, it would never be enough to rebut the manufactured implications and allegations which could be churned out and spun indefinitely.

3.   This is exactly the same tactic that Faggotry uses to attack a "target" male after it has first flattered him and loaded him with implications.  Disproving the Negative is justified by Faggotry on the basis of freedom of expression, investigative "journalism", or because the "target" is a public figure who has somehow waived his right to privacy.

4.   Confronted with Disproving The Negative, the "target" is sent into immediate damage control, panic-stricken denials, a sudden holiday out of the country, a plea for privacy.  The mainstream press which now has wind of Faggotry's manipulation of Disproving The Negative, is all over the story. It takes a very strong man to stand his ground and say absolutely nothing, because quite frankly, his private life is none of Faggotry's damn business.

5.   The intent is to force an Outing by the "target" confessing to being gay; or to orchestrate the Outing according to Faggotry's media coverage and Politically Correct dictates for maximum "sympathy / empathy" or manipulation of public perception for the benefit of Faggotry's agenda.


5.   So.....What's The Point.....?

1.   Elsewhere in this blog, we've made 3 main points about Faggotry:

• It is a global sub-standard behavioural franchise; AND
• It could be regarded as an Authoritarian State; AND
• It's a Human Ponzi Scam - new converts to "the lifestyle" and its bizarre Liberal (?) / Fascist politically correct ideology, are constantly required.  Otherwise, the Scam collapses.

6.  Faggotry As A Predator

1.   In our post, Faggotry An Authoritarian State...? we mentioned the predatory nature of Faggotry, which was essential to its survival:

5.   Faggotry - A Predator

Smith makes a revelatory observation about a centralized state i.e. centralized control, that applies equally to what we have long perceived as "the Politically Correct, Gay Authoritarian Stealth Creep" of Faggotry via its enablers.

".....the central state is genetically programmed to become an authoritarian state devoted to self-preservation and extension of its reach and power."

Our view is that Faggotry's ultimate agenda is to globally control every aspect of Politically Correct thought, speech and behaviour when it comes to dealing with, describing or analyzing gay men and their behaviour.  Accuracy and Analysis must be squelched. Spin and Outrage must prevail.  The Engine of Faggotry must be kept running.

The Engine of Faggotry is kept running in politics and media through:

• favouritism and public endorsement;
• grants and fundraising;
• "gay watchdogs" and shrieks of outrage;
• cronyism;

2.   Seen in that context, identifying individual male "targets" for Flattery, Implication and then forcing them to Disprove The Negative, makes perfect sense.  The predatory nature of Faggotry operates on two fronts simultaneously: 

1. the pushing of the "gay agenda"; and
2. the aggressive acquisition of "converts" who, whether by threat, intimidation, boycott, outrage, flattery, implication, Outing or being forced to Disprove The Negative, can be co-opted as "spokesmen / advocates / activists " for the agenda or at the very least, keep their mouths shut in tacit approval - or fear;

7.   The Independently Thinking Gay Man

1.   The independently thinking gay man who hasn't yet been seduced by Faggotry's slick hypnosis, looks on aghast at the scheming violations of the target male's privacy, personal liberty, thought and action.

2.   The good news is that (as we've stated before) we are living in the times of the Apocalypse, the true meaning of which, is that which was hidden is now revealed.  It is our view that more gay men are actively questioning Faggotry's ideology and methods.  We suspect there is a strong undercurrent of disgust.

3.   Furthermore, we are also living in times of massive systemic collapse and revelation. This is unstoppable. The pace and scale of systemic collapse will increase.  Faggotry is a predatory system operating in an old paradigm that is disingenuous, restrictive and dis-empowering.  It is destined to collapse as more independently thinking gay men simply opt out and claim their right to think, speak, act and live on their terms without having to look over their shoulder to see if they conform to a Politically Correct, Liberal / Fascist pre-set agenda - or whether they are about to be attacked.

4.   If we are correct in our analysis of Faggotry's methods of Flattery, Implication and forced Disproving The Negative, then Faggtory itself is liable for both gay-baiting and gay bashing.

5.   We don't know what the new paradigm for gay men will look like.  But we predict that when the current paradigm collapses, gay activists and enablers will be shrieking at, and blaming, each other. It's all they know.

Originally published 4 September 2014
Amended and Republished 3 July 2018

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What Is Race Play? 3

Now married to Superior Asian Male.  i drink His cum and He is now Man of the house.  i love Him and hunger for Him.  He gets anything He wants from me, the way life should be. 

-----"Asians Are Awesome", by shywhitesub.tumblr.com

WARNING: Sexually Explicit Images in link. NSFW
 

What Is Race Play? 2

You’ve been sucking his big White cock for hours and your jaw is numb. Your tiny asian dick has gone soft but still you continue sucking him and pleasuring him. 

That’s when it hits you. That small nagging feeling of shame. Your see yourself sucking his cock in the mirror and you can’t help but feel embarrassed. Embarrassed that you’re willing to debase yourself just to have opportunities to be with White Men. 

You tell yourself that you’re not like the other gaysians. You’re not a potato queen. You like guys of all races… but when you look at the stats, you find yourself saying “yes” to every White guy that messages you on Grindr while you say no to most POCs. [People of Colour]

You try to justify your feelings and rationalize your preferences. You exaggerate how much you’re attracted to non-White guys and you try to find White guys you don’t find attractive and exaggerate how much you don’t like them, but the truth is, the degree and quality of attraction you have to White Men is in a whole different league compared to your attraction to non-Whites.

You feel like a hypocrite for liking White Men almost exclusively. You try to downplay your attraction to them with your friends, because you’re afraid if they find out how much you love White Men, then it completely verifies their assumptions that you’re like any other typical gaysian. 

You spout all these ideals on social media about gay minorities and their marginalization, but you yourself subscribe to stereotypes about your race and submit to White Men.

But you push those feelings away when you suck his cock. You realize how much of a chink you truly are and no matter how hard you try to run away from it, you always come back to White Men. And after he’s done with your hole and used you like a whore, you stand there shell-shocked… ashamed at the things you did for him, disgusted at the names he called you and you called yourself, and loathing yourself and your asian-ness.

You tell yourself for the umpteenth time that you’re done with White Men. That you won’t be a chink no more. That is, until he messages you a week later, and you drop everything you’re doing and come crawling back to his…

BIG WHITE COCK.

-----asian fags for white men.tumblr.com

WARNING:  Sexually explicit images in the link. NSFW.

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What Is Race Play? 1

What is race play..? Is it just a way for white guys to be racist..?

Answer No. 1

Race play is the truthful and authentic dedication of service a useless nigger submits to for the greater glory of a superior White man. Fall in line, niggers. #WhiteLivesMatter
 -----Gay Nigger Cunt.tumblr.com


Answer No. 2 

Rather than responding with fantasy, I’ll answer this accurately. Raceplay is a form of kink sub-culture that eroticises racism, deriving sexual pleasure from the power inherent to racism. Some people in the sub-culture are genuinely racist, others aren’t and have come to it via their pre-existing interest in kink and domination.

One thing I want to cover is the idea that raceplay is something white people use to subjugate and be racist to other ethnic groups. It’s not that complicated. Raceplay eroticises racial domination of any kind- there are plenty of raceplay sites focussing on white men’s submission to Asians, Black men, Latinos, Muslims etc. Also, raceplay only works when both sides accept to and play with the fantasy.

Yes, raceplay has the potential to cause damage to people by inculcating racist ideas and making them think it’s “true”. But this is inherent to any form of powerplay within the sexual zone (fem-dom can lead to unhealthy understandings of femininity, Dom-Sub play can ruin people’s self-esteem). This is a risk that needs to be mitigated as best as possible, but one also needs to balance this with breaking the fantasy.

So when I do raceplay in real life I will always discuss it with a potential partner to make sure they are comfortable first.
-----fuck those asian slut boys.tumblr.com

Both quotes above taken from Traveling Gaysian Slut.tumblr.com

WARNING:  Sexually explicit content in all links. NSFW.

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Hong Kong Men: Distracted And Sexless 3

COMPLETED 24 JUNE 2018.

3.  The Behaviour Of Gay Men In Hong Kong


3.  The Behaviour Of Gay Men In Hong Kong

From Zero To....

1.  Let's start here:  Hong Kong's gay scene went from one of the world's most suppressed and actively prosecuted in the 1970s and 1980s, to (since 1991), one of the most liberal in Asia.

https://hk-bb-top.tumblr.com/post/175026097844/hkminegdie-正片香港

 
 

https://hk-bb-top.tumblr.com/post/175026087504/hkminegdie-香港-素人-基片

 

But.....

2.  Remember, as at June 2018, Hong Kong still does NOT have:

• the legislative amendment making the minimum age of consensual gay sex at 16 (i.e. equal to heteros), even though the Courts have made it clear, they will NOT convict any gay person who is 16 or over who has gay sex with another person 16 or over.  On the statute books, the minimum age of gay sex in Hong Kong is still 21 and for heteros it's 16.  But the Courts simply ignored the discrepancy, told the government it was utterly unfair and told them to change it.  The effect...? In reality, the minimum age of gay sex in Hong Kong is now 16.
• gay marriage;
• civil union or domestic partnership;
• same-sex benefits by law for married gay civil servants.  The earlier court case that allowed it for a Chinese civil servant and his white partner who were legally married in New Zealand, was overturned by the Court of Appeal who affirmed the strict definition of "marriage" as being between a man and a woman - and said this was a back door attempt to force gay marriage in Hong Kong.  This case will probably go to the Court of Final Appeal;
• same-sex benefits by law for gays in the private sector - although companies like HSBC already do it;
• laws against workplace discrimination and dismissal on the grounds of sexual orientation - even though the Equal Opportunities Commission publicly supports having them and has shown up at the Hong Kong Pride celebrations;
• dependent visas for same-sex couples married overseas;
• housing for gay seniors;

Why...?

3.  So, what's going on...?  Why is Hong Kong's gay scene flourishing in the absence of a comprehensive legislative framework..?

4.  The answer is, it initially didn't need one.  All it needed was decriminalization and things just took off.  Nobody thought about gay rights.  It was just hedonism that went from Zero to Quantum. Anything to get away from the Dark Days of Criminality.


Glory Days And Glory Holes

5.  Within weeks in 1991, the first crop of gay saunas opened and were packed out (sadly, none of them exist now, but that's not the point);

• Gameboys - Wanchai;
• BA Fitness - Wanchai;
• Central Sauna - Hollywood Road;
• Male - Paterson Street, Causeway Bay;
• Bobson - Hankow Road, Tsim Sha Tsui;
• Rome Club - Ashley Road, Tsim Sha Tsui;
• Yeuk Tak Chee - Prince Edward, that had been a licensed male bath house for years and was rumoured to be very gay, started getting the younger crowd.

6.  Gay retail opened up in the side streets of Admiralty and Wanchai, gay escorts started advertising in HKMag, gay bars like Waltzing Matilda became more visible in Tsim Sha Tsui and Propaganda on Wyndham Street was the anchor of gay clubs.  Cruising became more overt particularly in Tsim Sha Tsui, Central and Wanchai.  And the really gay gyms like California Fitness took off.  AIDS did very little to stop the hedonistic momentum, although drug and disease rates climbed.


Now...

7.  Now in Hong Kong there's a plethora of gay saunas, a few bars and karaoke joints, rampant gay escort advertising (from Mainland Chinese), gay publications, gay TV, gay radio stations, offline and online gay retail, Pride, Gay Film Festivals, gay pop stars, gay pageants, gay sports clubs, gyms with an overt gay clientele - and gay porn all over the Web.


But Gay In Hong Kong Is A Sex-Based Culture, Right....?

8.  Oh yeah....In addition to all the above, check out the blatant gay Public Displays of Affection going on downtown - particularly in Tsim Sha Tsui and Causeway Bay, SoHo (Central not so much coz it's the business district).  Take a walk in the parks like Kowloon Park and Hong Kong Park and be amazed.  Keep your eyes open in the MTR station and trains and watch the local boys holding hands and kissing. (Forget the fuckn' whites.  They've been doing that here for a while just to be "provocative")  For the local GAMs, such PDA are expressions of freedom and their right to be respected. So long as they're not causing a public nuisance or engaging in public sexual acts or nudity, the Police aren't going to interfere.....

9.  Been to the some of the public toilets lately where gay men cluster...?  Our GAM-Throats-On-The-Street inform us that more and more public toilets around town are becoming "popular".  Gone are the days when it was just 2 in a cubicle.  We've counted, in wide-eyed amazement, 3 and 4 men stepping out of one cubicle and 25 people cruising in one toilet at the same time.  It was just bonkers.


Our Conclusion

10.  Our conclusion is that whilst str8 men in Hong Kong may have become sexless herbivores, gay men in Hong Kong are going to the other extreme and have totally embraced the overt, body-conscious sexuality of gay culture - and all the accoutrements that go with it: the jockstraps, the T-backs, the underwear, the swimming trunks, the cock rings, the butt plugs, the tank tops, the gay brand names, the partying, the drinking, the drugs, the porn, Grindr, the saunas, the cruising, the beach parties, the boat parties........


And Then.....There's This:

If you guys ever have the time , please visit Hong Kong's Kowloon Park Swimming Complex 九龍公園游泳池 Hong Kong, at least once in your lifetime -- To experience the best, public cruising place in Asia -- just for the sake of telling people that you've been there, done that and it's enough!

-----"Cruising in Kowloon Park Swimming Complex 九龍公園游泳池 Hong Kong", 1 July 2017, Welcome To The World Of Simon Lover

(Pictures and videos included.  Just don't say we didn't warn you.....)


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Hong Kong Men: Distracted And Sexless 2

2.  What FuelMix Thinks
3.  Behaviour of Gay Men In Hong Kong


2.  What FuelMix Thinks

(1) Mainland Chinese in Hong Kong

1.  The problem in Very Rich Megacity is not the heat, the urban density  It's the massive wealth inequality, most notable in the sky high property prices. We won't get into what we consider was a strategic mistake by the Hong Kong Government in allowing Mainland Chinese to buy property here in the first place.  It's effect was to distort other parts of the economy and strain the urban infrastructure.

2. Not only was the distortion in Hong Kong economic and financial (it created a stock market ramp-up, aided by monetary cluelessness by the US Fed), it was also psychological.  Hong Kong people were open-mouthed as to where and how these Mainland Chinese made their money. China is at the forefront of digitizing its economy, to the point where large chunks of consumer transactions (even buying vegetables from the market stall) are done electronically on mobile phones.  Cashless is the way to go in China.  Yet paradoxically, here in Hong Kong, these same Mainland Chinese are showing up with massive wads of cash in shiny silver Rimova (only high-end stuff for them) suitcases.

3.  It's not surprising that Hong Kong Cantonese are resentful  of just how much the city has been overrun by Mainland Chinese and their (un-endearing) entitlement mentality. Accusations of "cockroach" and "locust" infestation are mingled with insinuations of "grey money" or "black money", both dismissive references to corruption or financial gain by dubious means.

4.  For years, Hong Kong Cantonese have been ground into the dirt financially.  Sure, they may be educated professionals with a 7-figure salary, speak 3 languages and drive a BMW.  But they may also be low-level office, retail or service types, living in public housing (or being on a waiting list for one) and commuting 90 minutes to work each way.  Neither can compete with or comprehend the near hyper-exponential speed of wealth accumulation of the Mainland Chinese.


(2)  Hong Kong Women And The "6Cs"

5.  Even before the Mainland chinks appeared, Hong Kong women were notorious for demanding "The Six Cs" in men:

1. Cash
2. Credit Card
3. Cartier
4. Condo
5. Car
6. Cock

6.  Our Mainland "brothers" and "sisters" (the semi- official Hong Kong Government term for those from across the border) just made it a lot worse.  We wouldn't be surprised if a chunk of Hong Kong men figured they'd lost even before they started.  That doesn't do wonders for your self-esteem or your "manliness".  Depression lowers Testosterone, you know.

7.  The "why bother?." mentality of some heterosexual Hong Kong men, faced with apparently insurmountable financial and sexual odds, would probably drive them into becoming the grass-eating "herbivores" mentioned in Part 1.  Far better to stay at home with the parents.  Besides, Cantonese families usually have more than one child. Let one of the siblings do the breeding.


(3)  Hong Kong's Work Ethic Encourages Distraction

8.  In a word, "notorious".  Whilst it hasn't reached the "Work Till You Drop Dead At The Office" levels seen in Japan,  Hong Kong's long working hours are both a bane and a benefit.  People get stressed out and very tired.  If they're horny, they'll go to online porn.  It's quick, usually free and there's no emotional commitment.

9.  Alternatively they'll be on Tetris, Candy Crush, Facebook, WeChat, What'sApp, slouched on their seats while commuting on the MTR - oblivious to the Dating Apps being advertised in the train.


(4)  There's Another Way Of Looking At It

10.  The rise of entrepreneurship in Hong Kong is gratifying.  The ecology is taking shape, aided by cameo appearances by people like Jack Ma, the founder of Alibaba, encouraging young people to become entrepreneurs.

11.  More and more college age types are standing up to their parents wishes and refusing to become doctors, architects, lawyers, accountants - the usual catalogue of "respectable" professions.  Instead, they're becoming risk-takers and self-employed.  Of necessity, that will delay breeding and/or dating as they strive to become financially independent.

COMING UP IN PART 3:
3.  Behaviour Of Gay Men In Hong Kong


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Hong Kong Men: Distracted And Sexless 1

1.  What The Hong Kong Press Reported
2.  What FuelMix Thinks
3.  Behaviour Of Gay Men In Hong Kong 

Underlining,  highlighting and bold print by FuelMix:


1.  What The Hong Kong Press Reported

 In a city already known for its low sex drive, there is a new generation of men who are uninterested in romance and relationships.  Whether technology is distracting them, or its the result of work or life pressure, women are feeling left out.

Most women would agree on the quintessential qualities they seek in a male partner (besides looks): that he should be kind, gentle and considerate. This is especially so for long-term relationships. The good news is Hong Kong has plenty of men around (who might possess some or all of these qualities), but the bad news is that an increasing number of them are uninterested in dating or getting married, and some have gone as far as to ditch romantic relationships for good.

Leading the charge is an infamous cohort of homebound men known as “otaku”. A Japanese term for men who are socially awkward and have limited family and romantic lives, these “geeks” tend to be diehard anime and manga fans who have little interest in dating. 

Then there are the “soshoku danshi”, which translates as “grass-eating men” or “herbivore men”. The term, coined by Japanese columnist Maki Fukasawa, describes a monk-like approach to life and relationships, in other words, no sex. 

There might be exceptions, but these men would rather invest themselves in online gaming and other solo activities than seek female company in their free time.

Studies in Japan estimate that this class of men, normally in their 20s and 30s, account for around 60 per cent to 70 per cent of the male population. Obviously, their reluctance to procreate is a major cause for concern. Japan has had one of lowest birth rates in the world for nearly a decade now.

Now Hong Kong appears to be following in Japan’s footsteps.  

According to Dr Paul Wong Wai-ching, associate professor of the Department of Social Work and Social Administration at the University of Hong Kong, the city has seen a rise in the number of “grass-eating men”.

“These herbivore men don’t connect with others, they don’t establish their own families or have children and don’t really contribute anything meaningful to society, either tangibly or intangibly,” says Wong. “They are like parasites who often live with their parents. So you can imagine how it’s going to affect society in the long run, socially and economically.”

Like Japan, our society is rapidly ageing, he adds. “These ‘grass-eating men’ are not capable of taking care of their ageing parents and neither are they capable of taking care of themselves when they become old, they are childless so they will have no family support,” he says. 

Another type of man you won’t be finding on any dating apps are the “modern-day hermits”. They seek extreme disconnection and isolation from the rest of society, they become practically invisible. This phenomenon is triggered by an overburdened sense of responsibility, and when the pressure becomes too unbearable it causes the person to pull away and unplug from society in a kind of self-imposed exile.

After a long-term detachment from society, their social skills diminish and this affects their ability to find employment. This has a domino effect of creating youths who are financially dependent on family and friends, jobless and lacking in drive. Not only does this mean these hermits never leave the nest or mature, but they are far less likely to have long-term relationships, romantic or friendship-based.

It seems counter intuitive that in a world as busy and interconnected as ours is, we are now lonelier than ever. 

We might not be as bad as Japan, with nearly half a million of these social recluses, according to a 2012 study, but there are still an estimated 20,000 to 40,000 hidden away in Hong Kong, according to Wong. 

Whatever the difference in numbers between here and Japan, this disconnection is threatening the social fabric that binds our community and we need to do something about it. 

While we can agree that dating can be terrifying, unforgiving and unpredictable, it is a rite of passage that many of us undertake as we grow up. 

At heart, humans are gregarious creatures, so whether it’s meeting someone at a party, bar or anywhere else, forming human connections is an integral part of our being. Relationships and friendships are highly important for humans.........

We can blame the prevalence of smartphones, laptops, computers, tablets and other electronic devices. We can even blame it on e-sports, a new pseudo sport that is sweeping the city with government backing. It can also be interpreted as another excuse for people to submerge themselves in the digital world rather than experience the real word.

“Those who advocate e-sports are sugar coating it as a genuine sport that encourages team interaction. It’s nonsense because it is just a limited form of interaction between a few members of a small team,” Wong says.

It’s a mistake to provide an escape hatch for people who want to avoid human interaction. If we continue to condone this kind of antisocial behaviour, we have to bear the risks and social consequences that come with it. 

This is a far more serious social issue than just a blip in the dating game.

-----"How herbivores, hermits and stay-at-home men are leaving are leaving a generation of Hong Kong women unsatisfied". South China Morning Post, 27 May 2018

 

COMING UP IN PART 2:

2.  What FuelMix Thinks
3.  Behaviour of Gay Men In Hong Kong

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Gay Berlin

A nice reliable person informed us that Hong Kong Airlines is investigating the feasibility of opening a new non-stop route from Hong Kong to Berlin, Germany.

We pricked up our ears because the financially-troubled and now defunct Air Berlin, had announced that it would start flights from Berlin to Hong Kong from October 2017.

At the moment, Cathay Pacific Airways flies non-stop from Hong Kong to Frankfurt.  They had briefly flown to Dusseldorf as well, but that route has been "suspended".

Berlin has a long gay history.  Prior to the Second World War, it was a hotbed of gay debauchery, gay pedophilia, gay cross-dressing and gay prostitution.  There was a brief hint of that in the movie, "Cabaret" starring Liza Minnelli.

More disturbingly and controversially, it was in Berlin that openly gay, violent, self-avowed "macho" men (they utterly despised effeminate men) met in a known gay bar and were instrumental in forming the National Socialist Party - better known as the Nazis.  They were part of Adolph Hitler's coterie, occupying the highest positions in the Hitler Youth Movement, the Storm Troopers and the Gestapo.

We have written about this in the 3 part series, "The Pink Swastika".  This is based on the book of the same name that challenges the conventional story that the Nazis were violently homophobic.  It is linked here:

The Pink Swastika 1
The Pink Swastika 2
The Pink Swastika 3

In case you faggots didn't know, Berlin is the raunchiest (and most drug-fucked) gay city in Europe, and probably in the world.  Look it up.

What goes on quite brazenly in the Berlin gay scene is wwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy beyond "vanilla".

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Breaking From Binary

COMPLETED 16 MAY 2018

Are labels like, "gay", "str8" and "bi" obsolete...?

Underlining, highlighting and bold print by FuelMix: 


....... A YouGov poll this week put the number of 18- to 24-year-old Brits who identify as entirely heterosexual at 46%, while just 6% would call themselves exclusively gay. Sexuality now falls between the lines: identity is more pliable, and fluidity more acceptable, than ever before.

The gay-straight binary is collapsing, and it’s doing so at speed. The days in which a celebrity’s sexual orientation was worthy of a tabloid scandal have long since died out. Though newspapers still report on famous people coming out and their same-sex relationships, the lurid language that once accompanied such stories has been replaced by more of a gossipy, “did you know?” tone,........And the reaction of the celebrities involved has morphed, too, into a refusal to play the naming game. Arena-filling pop star Miley Cyrus  posted an Instagram of a news story that described her as “genderqueer” with the caption, "NOTHING can/will define me! Free to be EVERYTHING!!!"  Kristen Stewart, who has been followed around by insinuations about the “gal pal” she is often photographed with for a couple of years, finally spoke about the relationship in an interview with Nylon magazine  this month. She said, simply, “Google me, I’m not hiding”, but, like the people surveyed by YouGov, refused to define herself as gay or straight. “I think in three or four years, there are going to be a whole lot more people who don’t think it’s necessary to figure out if you’re gay or straight. It’s like, just do your thing.”

..... The more people who are out, the more normal it becomes; the less alone a confused kid in a small town looking at gossip websites might feel; the less baffled the parent of a teenager who brings home a same-sex date might be. Combine that with the seemingly unstoppable legislative reinforcement of equal rights, too – gay marriage becoming legal in Ireland, in the US – and suddenly, it seems less “abnormal”, less boundary-busting, to fall in love or lust with someone of the same gender.

“I would describe myself as a bisexual homoromantic,” says Alice, 23, from Sussex. For the uninitiated, I asked her to explain. “It means I like sex with men and women, but I only fall in love with women. I wouldn’t say something wishy-washy like, ‘It’s all about the person,’ because more often it’s just that I sometimes like a penis.”.......

She says that even among those who exclusively date people of the same gender, there is a reluctance to claim an identity as proscriptive as “gay”. “Most young people who are gay don’t see it as a defining property of their character, because they don’t have to, because society doesn’t constantly remind them of their difference.” However, she is careful to point out that this is very much the case in the small, liberal part of London where she lives now. “[Not defining] is something I feel entitled to as a person who lives in London, but I didn’t feel entitled to it in a small town in the home counties. I’ve never experienced discrimination about my sexuality, but I’m aware that it’s because I ‘pass’ [as straight].”

In fact, among the young British people I spoke to, geography is vital. Lucy, 25, wonders if the number of people who say they are not straight really tallies with the number of people who are actually acting upon those desires. “Saying you’re sexually fluid means you’re part of a movement. It means you’re seen as forward-thinking,” she says, suggesting there is a certain cachet attached to being seen as open that does not come with affirmed heterosexuality. She also believes it is more of a metropolitan story than necessarily representative of Britain as a whole. “If I went back to my home town in the Midlands, we wouldn’t sit around talking about ‘sexual fluidity’. You’re a ‘dyke’, or you’re not. There’s only one type of lesbian there.” 

Many people questioning their sexuality make the traditional migration from a small town to a big city to find like-minded people – to find their tribe, to belong. It is a familiar and understandable story that you hear across generations. But now, within these cities, the pubs and bars that were once a meeting point for non-straight people are beginning to disappear, swallowed up by the brutal economics of an obscene property market........

In fact, the word queer, once the defiant reclamation of a homophobic slur, has become a ubiquitous term. While the young people I spoke to were largely resistant to the word “bisexual”, even if they are sleeping with both men and women, they used “queer” easily and freely. “Among our callers and our volunteers, more and more people are identifying as ‘queer’, particularly among younger generations,” says Natasha Walker, a trustee of the LGBT+ Helpline, which recently changed its name from the London Lesbian & Gay Switchboard in order to be more inclusive. “In the past, people were fighting for the right to be able to define themselves as lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans* etc. Although this is very much still the case, there is also a definite shift towards an acceptance of people as they are – label or no label.” 

There is also some appeal in the radical roots of “queer”, particularly as same-sex desire becomes more usual: while mainstream assimilation makes discrimination less likely, it does run the risk of removing the “outsider” identity of gay life, which many are keen to preserve.

“Essentially, the gays are getting married and it’s all become normalised,” says John, 32, from Plymouth. “‘Queer’ is still a political term. The older I get, the more I use it, because I feel I understand it more than when I was 22, but it’s also a cultural shift, absolutely.” While the word “bisexual” is, as John puts it, “a bit woolly”, “queer” encompasses a broad spectrum of desires, and is inclusive of those people who might reject the gender binary, too. 

Moving beyond the need to identify as one thing or the other feels utopian in many respects, and it acknowledges that for many people, sexuality is not an either/or decision. But it also relies on an idealised vision of an open-minded and kind society, which is true for the privileged world of, say, celebrities, but is not always the case elsewhere. Casual homophobia has not been erased by semantic optimism. John says a cab recently cancelled his trip after pulling up to the kerb and seeing him kissing his boyfriend. “We ran after him, but he just carried on.” Last month, one of John’s friends was spat at from a car window as he stood outside a gay pub. These are small, but constant reminders that abuse, discrimination and prejudice are present and pernicious, in small towns and in big cities. So if more young people reject heteronormativity, then that can only be a good thing, whether they act upon it, or not. But there is power in claiming an identity, and it is worth remembering, too, that complacency may be as dangerous as labels.

----- ' "I'm a bisexual homoromantic": why young Brits are rejecting old labels ', The Guardian, 18 August 2015

 

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