Talking To Adam 14

I have to get back before midnight you know, 'coz I sorta have a boyfriend.

Of course I'm cheating on him all the time.  Come on, for fuck's sake.....all gay guys cheat on their boyfriend.  You have to remember that for a gay guy, a boyfriend is just an excuse that he can say to another guy when he's cruising and he doesn't find that other guy attractive.

That's it.  That's all a boyfriend is good for.  Just a fuckin' excuse to throw in an ugly guy's face.

But when a hot guy comes along.....the boyfriend and the excuse are toast.

For FuelMix's view, see the post, Open Season.


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Debt Load or Viral Load..?

The white fag at the University of Fag Bar (pending accreditation) bitched about how he was maxed out on his credit card, but bragged about the wild sex he'd been having lately.

Then FuelMix looked at him closely.....the fag's eyes were watery, he had the sniffles, his nose red, his lips chapped. The conversation was punctuated by the fag's raspy voice lurching into extended coughing fits.

FM:  You OK...?

Fag:  Yeah [gasping for breath].....I need some dick, some rock and some cash - otherwise my roomie's gonna throw me out

FM:  Shit.......

Fag [groans]:  Awww man......don't say that....

FM:  Why....?

Fag:  I've been having cramps and the shits for the last 3 days......oh man.....gotta shit right now.....

The fag slid away to the toilet, muttering how he needed to be fucked before dinner time. He returned a few minutes later, smiling. Some old guy lurking in the toilet, had offered him cash if he'd spend the night with him  and let the troll cum in his ass.

Fag (grinning):  Things are looking up..!!

FM:  Bet your banker will be pleased

Fag:  Don't have one...but at least I'll get dinner and a place to crash

Originally published 28 April 2006
Amended and Republished 4 March 2014 | 24 February 2018

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The Watersports Ambassador 2

Best Gay Saunas In Hong Kong For Watersports Fun

The 32 year old, western-educated, professional, local Chinese (who describes himself as, "The Watersports Ambassador"), continues his conversation with FuelMix in the sauna:

Unlike Europe and the US, there's no purpose-built gay space in Hong Kong for watersports parties. I've been doing the rounds of the saunas in town to see which are the best venues for watersports action. Due to the way that saunas are laid out in Hong Kong, I just looked at the suitability of the Shower Areas.  Do you want me to tell you....?  You can tell your buddies and who knows...? Maybe things will happen...

[Set out by FuelMix in alphabetical order with "The Watersports Ambassador's" comments, as best as he can recall]:

Arena - The shower area is huge and just perfect, especially the 2 more private showers behind the partition wall;

Big Top - Nah, it's very small and very public and there's usually a queue of people waiting for the shower;

Birds - Forget it.  Too dark.

Central Escalator - Nah, too small;

Colony - That shower area is decent sized and has potential.  If you get turned on being watched by the guys in hot tub, that could be fun;

Galaxy - quite possible, 'coz most of the showers are private - except the ones near the Steam Room;

Gateway - possible if they're not too many peeps around.  Nice shower area;

Gong Guan - oh wow..!! Just perfect.  Very nicely done shower area with just the right amount of privacy and publicity.  Can you imagine how hot it would be if you're showering near the glass window as people are walking by and there's a guy kneeling down in front of you and you're pissing on him as you're showering...??!!  And there's also the slightly hidden showers.

Hutong - just too attitudinal wherever you go in the premises.  Those guys are probably drinking their own piss anyway when no one's looking.....HAHAHAHAHAHA..!!! 

Jungle - the showers have potential 'coz they're behind a partition.  Bit of attitude though.

KK Fitness - haven't been there yet.  But I'm told it's a much older crowd with some younger guys.

My Way - Nice shower area, big and bright.  Very public so it requires some confident guys to play.  But the showers have some great potential;

QQ Fitness - Shower area has surprisingly good potential, especially the 2 large private showers;

Rainbow - Haven't been;

Soda - Small shower area done in black tiles. Certainly has potential;

You know the Gay Hanky Code..?  Yeah..?  If I'm downtown and wearing jeans, I stick a yellow hanky in the back right hand pocket.  You know what that means...?  Man...it would be awesome if a hot guy stopped me in the street and said, "I saw the hanky, let's do it....there's a sauna nearby".

If  I'm cruising around, feeling slutty, I've run into white gay guys on the street who've spotted my hanky.  Their eyes widen and they're thinking like, "OMG...!! Is this chink really into piss...??!! Fuck yeah...!!"  I smile and lick my lips as I walk past.

Lately, if I walk past hot local Chinese with my yellow hanky sticking outta my right butt, all I get is, "nice hanky..!!"  AAAAAaaaaaargh....!!!

 
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The Watersports Ambassador 1

"When you honestly share who you are, the men who are a match for it, will show up - and the better you will feel about yourself"
------The Watersports Ambassador 

A 32 year old, professional, western-educated, local Chinese talks about why he's a self-proclaimed "Ambassador For Watersports And Raunchier Sex".  The conversation took place at the sauna where "The Watersports Ambassador" cruised FuelMix:

I'm always looking for hot guys with muscular bodies and Cut cocks.  Unlike other gay guys, age and race are not an issue for me.  Body type, personality and open-mindedness are.  I'm not into stocky guys, fat guys, out-of-shape Daddy guys or really skinny twinks.  I'm not into smokers and drug-takers. I don't smoke, I'm drug and disease-free and I get tested.  Occasionally, if it's offered, I might do Poppers.

I don't bother with shit like Craigslist or Grindr or whatever.  None of that works for me.  I think it's a scam and it's depressing.  I didn't like the attitude, the time-wasting and frequently, the abuse I got when I honestly told them what I'm into.....talk about judgmental fags......

I'm into Piss and Raunch.  I got into it a few years ago after I attended the gay piss parties in San Diego and Los Angeles.  That's when I realized I'm a Bottom when it comes to that type of play.  I get turned on when I'm kneeling down in front of a hot guy and he's pissing on me - all over me, on my face, my lips, my body.  If I feel like drinking some,  I'll open my mouth and let his piss hit my tongue and I'll gulp it down too.  Often I'll deep throat his cock and let him control the piss flow down my throat while he spits on my face and continues to fuck my mouth while pissing down my throat.

I love using piss and spit as a means of sexual fun.  It broadens my repertoire and it broadens my appreciation of the man too.......a hot open-minded guy is a huge turn on..!!

When I realized I was attracted to piss and raunch play and that I really loved being a Bottom in that kind of play, it was really liberating.  I didn't have to explain myself to anybody, I had found my sexual niche and I was very happy.  The gay watersports venues are easy to find in the US and Europe. You don't have to waste your time looking for the right guys online and dealing with no shows.  At those watersports parties, at least 100 guys would show up, a lot of them with good bodies.

What I discovered when I was living in the US and attending the piss parties, was that I never got the stupid attitude that white guys would give an Asian guy in the saunas.....you know that whole "preference" shit..... I never felt or experienced that unspoken racism that normally exists in the saunas.......and you know what the irony was...?? Some of those watersports parties were actually held in the gay saunas where normally, the white customers were giving Asians attitude...!!  It was just a whole different crowd.

At those parties, I had no trouble finding guys of all ethnicities to play with, either individually or in groups.  First I thought, maybe because I was a piss bottom, being Asian was just fine with them........it was just a way they could act out their "superior" racism on me........but then, I started getting invitations to attend private gay piss parties from both Asians and whites who were a combination of Tops and Bottoms.  It was amazing......I could be a piss bottom AND I could be versatile when it came to fucking.....the guys were friendly, they were in great shape, there was no attitude - and we'd meet up afterwards for a burger and salad...!! HAHAHAHAHAHA...!!

That's when I realized something about gay guys into raunch.....there was waaaaay less attitude and racism and a lot more honesty.  I had guys who said that they were HIV+ and who said they would only piss on my body.  That was fine by me.  No harm done.

And here's the thing about piss play.  A lot of guys - especially here in Hong Kong - are totally ignorant about how safe it is compared to other gay sexual activities like barebacking or cum swallowing or sex under the influence of drugs.  

For example, there is no risk to you if someone pisses on your body.  Just shower it off.  Also, HIV cannot be transmitted by drinking piss.  But HIV can be transmitted in cum and saliva.  However, just like in sucking and fucking unprotected, if you swallow piss from another guy, you could ingest the micro-organisms of gonorrhea and chlamydia that live in his urethra - the piss shaft.  But, piss by itself, is sterile.  There is no risk to you if you drink your own piss.

If the guy is a heavy drug-user, then you could be ingesting the fluid remains of the drugs in his system. Not a good idea.

The point I'm making is that there are Gay Health resources online in which people can find out the pros and cons of watersports.  It just cracks me up when I see these stupid local Chinese guys chain-smoking in the sauna, taking Viagra, doing poppers, admitting to taking drugs - and then claiming they're healthy and only into safe sex.  Yeah right..... they're in denial, they're so fuckin' ignorant, they're not as healthy as they claim - and they're missing out on new and in some ways, a safer sexual experience.

Can I offer you some links about watersports.....?   You can pass them around to your friends and tell them it's from "The Watersports Ambassador..!!" **

FuelMix says:

**To get the links:

• write to fuelinjectedmale@live.hk 
• Subject Line: Piss On Me..!!
• make a request for the links
• state you are of legal age
• say why you like this blog

 Incomplete emails will be ignored
(VIP Readers can simply request the links) 

COMING UP IN PART 2:
Best Gay Saunas In Hong Kong For Watersports Fun
 
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What If..?

"You know the tragedy of being a gay man..?" sighed the 40s GWM, with whom FuelMix was only casually acquainted to the point that he didn't know or care about his name.....

FM:  I can think of several

40sGWM:  It's gay men's propensity to lie in general, and to lie about their age in particular

FM:  That's old news

40sGWM:  Yeah...I've lied about my age so many times, I've come to regret it

FM:  Why..?

40sGWM:  Well, at first I didn't care.  Hell, every gay guy out there lies.  The profiles online and on the apps.....how much of their stats are true..? 

FM: [shrugs] Who knows..?  I prefer the saunas.  You can size people up better and it's more time-effective.

40sGWM: Exactly, the majority of them know they're wasting time surfing profiles.  They know the failure rates are high.  It's a voyeurs game.  Very few will actually hook up because they've already assumed that each profile has lies in it.  Besides, before the apps came along, they got burned and conned pretty badly in chat rooms and Craigslist

FM:  Probably

40sGWM: But here's the thing...every now and then I run into a cute gay guy, maybe in the sauna or cruising on the street, or making eye contact somewhere. We start chatting generally about where we're from, what we do, where we live....we're having a really good conversation and he asks about my age. Straight off the bat, I lie.....I quote an age 10 years younger to see his reaction.  I prefer guys younger than me, 20-somethings or early 30s, so I don't wanna come across as too old and scare them away....so I drop 10 years immediately.  You know how it is with gay guys.  For some reason, in gay sub-culture, being 35 and over is the kiss of death.....god only knows where THAT came from...

FM:  Yep

40sGWM:  But the irony is that 20-something guy probably told me his correct age.  Since I've already lied to him about my age, I feel that I polluted the conversation or our sexual encounter and my behaviour towards him changes.....I start pushing him away socially and sexually.  Initially, it gave me a sense of power - that I could control my encounters - but the effect was that I got rid of some really good people and lost the chance of real friendships

FM:  Real friends in Fagland are hard to find.  But there's no shortage of flakes, liars, backstabbers and gossip queens

40sGWM:  Lately, I've been reconsidering my behaviour and wondering if I'm a coward for not having the courage to tell younger guys my real age, for fear they'll reject me as being too old.  In my quiet moments, I wonder if I'm just another fag lying my way through life or if I'm going through "gay menopause" or that I'm deep in denial because I'm over that dreaded age of 35 and can't bear to face the facts

FM:  Denial runs real deep in Fagland.  It's a hedonist-based culture.  It's based on looks, apparent youth, drugs, partying and sex.  After a certain age, they arbitrarily marginalize you - not realizing that they're gonna reach that age too and probably look like shit

40sGWM: These days I've been wondering what if I had the courage to tell him straight up what my real age was..?  What if he just accepted me as I am...?  What if  I was strong enough to handle his rejection because I was too old for him...?  What if I behaved as if I was genuinely proud of my age..?  What if I really didn't care what people thought of my age..?  What if I didn't lie to the younger guys about my age any more..?  What if I actually made some really nice, younger friends..?
I'm not proud of the way I've acted.  Something has to change.....I can't go around lying to myself as a gay man, even though gay culture is based on lies

FM [dripping with sarcasm]:  Wow...! A white guy with a conscience.....who would have thought..??

40sGWM [grins]:  You hate us whites don't you..?

FM [grins]:  Sorry, it's just a "preference"

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Frustrated, Fat, Gay Filipino

FuelMix in conversation with a Filipino here in Very Rich Megacity:

As you can see, I'm nothing to look at.  After years of anguish in my childhood and in my teenage years, I'm comfortable admitting it.  Being gay and below-average looking, is a double curse.  And being Filipino, adds a third layer.

So.....here I am.....short, fat, really dark, a bit hairy, too ugly to be gay.  Other Filipinos comment how dark I am and that really hurts.  I mix with them socially, but not one of them asks if I'm married or dating anyone.  I suspect they've concluded I'm not good looking enough to get anyone anyway.  I guess I'm too ugly to be straight as well.

Finding a social group when your own people don't relate to you is tough.  I went to church a few times because many Filipinos are Roman Catholic.  The people were very nice and welcoming. Some innocently asked if I was half-black.....I was stunned.  I replied that I was totally Filipino and they seemed embarrassed.  Maybe because I'm dark and have a wide flattish African-looking nose.....I don't blame them.....but it still hurts.

I stopped going to church because I couldn't find the gay guys and their social gatherings bored me.  Sometimes it gets intensely lonely and you can't go into confession and tell the priest that you're an unhappy gay man.  What's he gonna say...?  How many Hail Mary's is he going to prescribe for emotional pain..??

There are days I feel depressed about my physical appearance as a gay man.  Looks are everything in gay culture and gay men can be vicious about whether you measure up in their eyes.

In the Philippines, if you go into a gay bar and you're dark like me, the lighter skinned Filipino guys won't come near you.  These are the ones who claim to have Spanish blood in them and think they are a cut above.  On their Grindr profiles, they'll say they are "Asian-Latin" or "Asian-Spanish"  Several times, I've experienced them physically turning their backs on me as I approached......and I was only walking past them...!!

I think the reason they try so hard to present themselves as "Asian-Latin" or "Asian-Spanish" is because outside the Philippines, the Filipinos are regarded as inferior - even though we may be university graduates from our own country. We work overseas as domestic helpers, waiters, cooks, musicians, singers, dancers, shop assistants, staff on cruise ships, hotel workers.  In so many ways, we keep business and the economy going.  We work long hours, put up with abuse and don't get paid much.

In Hong Kong the Chinese perception of Filipino inferiority is very strong.  It is racism and as an ethnic minority here, it's not surprising.  What hurts is the racism amongst gay men in this city, particularly in the hookup apps like Grindr.  I've had comments like, "Sorry too dark" or "too black for me" or they just go quiet if I say "Filipino" when they ask my ethnicity.  Others sent me messages saying, "I've seen lighter skin Filipinos, so you must be half-black right..?"  That really hurts because they think I'm hiding something when I'm not.

On the positive side of Grindr, I have met other chubby guys socially.  They're sort of casual buddies.

Sexually, I'm a Bottom.  If I show up at Central Escalator, I can get action in the steam room from white guys.  I just kneel on the ground and wait for anybody to fuck my mouth.  I found that since I'm not the hottest guy around, cruising doesn't work for me.  Instead, it's better if I stay somewhere darker like the steam room or the Dark Room, get on my knees and wait to be face fucked.  If the guy is really horny, I'll offer my ass and a condom and let him fuck me publicly.

For guys who are not that good looking, being a Bottom is better.  Your mouth and ass can always be used as the fuckholes of last resort.

Copyright © 2006 – 2017 FuelMix All Rights Reserved 

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Moving In The White Direction

"You know what I CANNOT STAND about whites..??" spat the 36 year old GWM as he shook his head in disbelief, "it's their fuckin' entitlement mentality.."

FM:  How so..?

36GWM:  Living in Asia, you can see a leftover colonialism. They think that just because their companies sent them here, or because their parents or grandparents strutted around during colonial times that, as the next generation, they've inherited the entitlement mentality and the perks that override everybody else........The biggest joke is that the latest generation of  expatriate whites are mostly economic refugees fleeing to Asia..!!  Shit...I'm one of them!!....I'm happy to admit I crawled here looking for a better life..!!  Life in the West totally sucks..!!

FM:  Can you be more specific on white entitlement mentality?

36GWM:  Yeah, sure.  You know that controversy in online ads where if a white guys says, "No Asians", that's a preference, but if an Asian guy says, "No whites" that racist..?

FM:  Yeah...

36GWM:  Would you agree that's part of the white entitlement mentality..?

FM:  Yeah...

36GWM:  What if I told you that from my experience, some white guys are pushing sexual preference even further..?

FM:  How..?

36GWM:  By trying to force it on other whites...

FM:  Explain

36GWM:  Just like some Chinese gays find other Chinese guys really ugly, I don't hide the fact that as a white guy, I find other whites sexually repulsive. I can't bear to look at them in the bars and the saunas.  They are NOT my type.  I have a VERY SPECIFIC type to which I'm attracted...light skinned North Indian guys, light skinned Pakistani guys - especially the ones from the UK - Middle East guys, guys from Portugal, some North African types.  And I totally LLUUUUV  CUT cocks.  I think they're just beautiful on hot, muscular exotic guys with gorgeous features.  Got it...?? That's MY type and I'm proud of my choices

FM:  Fair enough. You can certainly find them in Hong Kong

36GWM:  Yeah, except some whites don't want you to find your own choice..... I put up an ad on Craigslist stating what I was looking for.  Within an hour, my ad was flagged for removal. For several consecutive days, I re-posted the ad and each time, it was flagged for removal within a couple of hours and disappeared.  I was furious

FM: What makes you think it was a white who flagged you..?  It could have been a bitter chink

36GWM:  I mentioned that the ads were up for a couple of hours before they were flagged for removal.  Several times I received responses from whites offering to hook up. I politely declined saying my ad was VERY SPECIFIC and thanking them for responding.  Next thing I knew, my ad was flagged and disappeared

FM:  It's not conclusive, but it is circumstantial

36GWM:  I continued to re-post the ad and began to suspect the same whites were responding to it.  Again I politely declined, pointing out my ad was VERY SPECIFIC.  That's when they got abusive  - which I ignored - and my ad was flagged for removal and disappeared

FM:  Sounds a bit fishy...what kind of abuse..?

36GWM:  "fuckin' Muslim cocksucker"; "brown nigger fetish"; "you're wasting your time on curry flavoured shit"; "pussyboy for terrorists".......you get the picture
  
FM:  Whites at their poetic best 

36GWM:  It wasn't the abuse that angered me.....it was their assumption that they could override my choices just because THEY were white, and then humiliate me - as a white man -  when I stood by my choices and excluded THEM.  They were showing a completely fucked up sense of entitlement

FM:  They had no reason to respond to your ad since your stipulations were clear

36GWM:  Exactly.  They were seeing what they could get away with.  It was a form of intimidation to get me to back down from my choices - or to make me feel guilty for being a white man and having the balls to say what non-white ethnicity I'm attracted to. As a gay man, incidents like these, really cement your views on your own race.  I was the victim of  intra-white racism.... that somehow, I'm less of a white guy for being attracted to foreigners.  I'm ashamed and angry at the behaviour of my own race.  In my next life, I'm gonna come back as a more superior race.

FM:  [grins]  Amen

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Sole Sister

"OMG...!!" swooned the Banana with the telltale nasal twang, shaking his head in disbelief as he propped himself up against the Locker Room wall, breathing heavily.  He pointed his finger at FuelMix who entered the area mostly naked, his towel an afterthought.

"I can't fuckin' believe I just did THAT to YOU in the Steam Room...!!.."

"Yeah....it was pretty good....you're talented when you're down there" grinned FuelMix, fumbling with his locker key.

"No, dude you don't understand....I've NEVER done THAT..."

"Really..?" said FuelMix, "you came across like a pro...I got the impression you were totally into it, judging by the noises you were making..."

"I was into it!!....THAT'S the thing that shocks me....seriously dude, I've NEVER, EVER done that with another guy.....me.....face down LYING TOTALLY FLAT on the Steam Room floor, sucking a guy's toes and licking his feet.....and then letting him fuck my mouth with his feet.....Oh God.....Fuuuck....I was TOTALLY FLAT ON THE FLOOR.....lying on my stomach and people were just stepping over me as I sucked your feet...!!"

"I didn't force you to do anything..." said FuelMix gently, unsure how to handle Banana's meltdown.

"Yeah..... I know, I know....I saw you in the shower.....you have a hot body....and I really wanted to suck you.....so I followed you into the Steam Room - but then those 3 guys got to you first.....you had two of them licking your chest and armpits and the third one licking your balls.....I couldn't get to your cock....and I was totally hungry for your body....and I needed to taste something of yours.....so I started with your thighs and just worked my way down.....all the way down to your toes and just lay there....face down, flat on the floor, in a trance.....while you fucked my mouth with your feet as the other 3 guys serviced you....for some strange reason, I felt I totally belonged there on the floor.....Oh My Gawd....I didn't even fuckin' care if people stepped on me or over me....I just needed to suck on you....Shhhiiitt....Oh My Gaaawwdd..."  He was still breathing hard and deep, analyzing and rationalizing.

"No harm done, you don't hear me complaining..." said FuelMix, "besides...lotsa guys come to a gay sauna to experiment and do stuff they've never done before.  It's a pretty safe environment, so long as you're not fucked up on drugs and shit..." 

"But you made me lose control..." said the Banana softly...."I'm always in control of myself.....but it's like you're wicked....not in an evil way....just wicked.....kinda supernatural....you triggered a response in me right at that moment that I couldn't stop....."  He bowed his head and put on his glasses. They sat skewed on his face. He opened his locker and stared blankly at its contents, still in a daze.

"Supernatural huh.?" smirked FuelMix as he gave Banana a parting hug, "I'll take it".

Originally published 25 February 2016
Amended and Republished 24 August 2017

Copyright © 2006 – 2017 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Fatal Attraction

Grumpy, sweaty and in pain for the last few days, having fucked up in the gym,  FuelMix sat grimly on a bench in a downtown Park looking at the moon, 2 days before a Lunar Eclipse.  He had shopping bags, an aching back and an allegedly cold drink that decided to surge to the 32 degree Celsius ambient urban temperature by dripping condensation all over the crotch of his shorts.

A few weeks earlier, FuelMix had unwittingly discovered that a strategically wet crotch was an erotic accessory on the packed streets of Very Rich Megacity where gay cruising has become more brazen.

But at that moment, limp with humidity and tired, FuelMix was barely registering the parade of genetic losers cruising the park in search of cock......some suspicious Paki guys, ugly whites, local GAMs, fat GAMS, Shenzhen moneyboys, the gym bunnies.....

Every now and then, a small-built skinny GAM with a baseball cap would slink by, deliberately slowing as he walked past FuelMix, making intense eye contact and licking his lips.

"Wet crotch syndrome", thought FuelMix, spreading his legs to give the GAM a better look, "works every time - except he's not my type and I'm not in the mood anyway..."

"Don't cruise him..!!" said a voice, softly but sharply. "Don't go near him...!!"

FuelMix turned and recognized a Friendly GAM whose face he'd sat on a few times.

"He's dangerous..!!" said the  Friendly GAM pointing to the little skinny GAM now scoping FuelMix from a short distance.

FM:  Whaddya mean "dangerous..??"

FGAM:  He's HIV and possibly has AIDS

FM:  How do you know...?

FGAM:  Several times he's told people in the park he's HIV and over the past few months, they've noticed he's lost weight......

FM:  So what's he looking for...?

FGAM:  To infect people.**  He said so himself.  He's a bottom and insists on being fucked bareback.  He's a very angry and mean guy.  He doesn't know who infected him and he takes his revenge by infecting others.....he is emotionally very hurt.  He doesn't care who he infects...

FM:  He'll play with anyone...?? What type of guys...?

FGAM:  Your type.....young-looking foreign guys with a gym body, Pakistani guys and local Chinese college students whom he persuades to fuck him bareback.  He especially wants the Chinese college students and gym guys like you. He said he's angry he can't go to the gym anymore....maybe they found out about his HIV status and stopped him from coming.....and he hates Chinese college students.....

FM: HIV is not transmitted by using the gym. So... this infected Hong Kong Chinese hates Hong Kong Chinese college students.... and hates gym guys.....?  And deliberately infects them because he doesn't know who infected him.....?

FGAM:  Yes

FM:  That suggests it was somebody from those 2 groups

FGAM:  Could be...

FM:  What have the Pakistani guys got to do with this...?

FGAM:  He knows they're poor and horny - and they like fucking bareback.  He jokes about it

FM:  And the Chinese college students..?

FGAM:  He knows they come to the park to relieve study stress...he'll offer to suck them and then in the heat of the moment, he'll beg them to fuck him bareback and come in his ass

FM:  How does he get the gym guys..?

FGAM:  There are 2 big gyms nearby in Tsim Sha Tsui - Goji and Physical.  He cruises the gym guys that come to the park and flatters them.  Same as the college students, he'll offer to suck them and then beg them to fuck him bareback and come in his ass

FM:  How do you know any of this is accurate..?  It could be just gossip.....it doesn't make sense...if he's cruising to infect people, why would he be telling people about it..?

FGAM: It could be just gossip - but on the other hand, why would they pick on this guy to gossip about when there are other guys cruising in the park...? I got this information from people I've known for a while, some of whom have spoken to him. They said he has no problems bragging about what he's doing.....anyway, I'm just warning you 'coz I like you.....well actually [giggles] I like your body, your ass and your cock [giggles some more].....

FM:  Thanks, I appreciate the warning - oh yeah...and the compliments

Friendly GAM walked away into the park darkness.  The little skinny GAM continued to stare intensely at FuelMix, licking his lips.

** In gay slang, the act of deliberately infecting someone with HIV and not telling them about it, is known as "Stealth Pozzing".  It can be a criminal offence.

Copyright © 2006 – 2017 FuelMix All Rights Reserved
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Massage Musings

A mature, local Chinese gentleman in his late 60s, with impeccable manners and English, cruised FuelMix downtown.  He offered a non-sexual massage and conversation at Galaxy Sauna.

He also offered to pay the entry fee of HK$80.00 when FuelMix informed him that he had written the place off [see the reviews of Galaxy Sauna] and would not go there unless it was paid by someone else.

FuelMix, freshly showered, relaxed naked on a towel in one of the private cabins. The Mature GAM began chatting, gently massaging FuelMix's back and legs:


1.  Gay Men's Lousy Manners

MGAM:  It's a pleasure to find someone with good manners who respects more mature men - [giggles] even if you were blunt when you said you wouldn't pay.  These days, younger men are surprisingly rude to older gay men, particularly the ones in their 20s.  I think it's a combination of a lousy family life, endless internet distractions, hookup apps and their failure to hookup; and a misplaced attitude.

FM:  You have a point.  There's nothing to be gained by being gratuitously rude to someone just because of their age.  However, some older gay men can be very pushy either in the bar or in the saunas.  When they refuse to acknowledge a polite rejection, it might become necessary to be more direct. 


2.  Getting Cruised By Older Gay Men  

MGAM:  Have you had older men come on to you..?

FM:  Many times.  I don't have an age bias, just a bias against stupidity. Older men vary in their approach.  Some show a bit of class, like yourself; some are clumsy repetitive gropers that need to be shoved away; others are shy and submissive; others are apparently married; and others come at me with an attitude of entitlement based on racial differences of perceived superiority and assumed inferiority.  Those are the ones I laugh at the most.


3.  Gay Seduction As A Dying Art

MGAM:  Do you think gay seduction is a dying art..?

FM:  Totally.  There's a technological paradox:  Thank the Web, emails and Instant Messaging for destroying attention spans and manners; and thank video and mobile games like Candy Crush or Pokemon Go for creating hypnotic fixations.  And then thank gay porn for showing hot bodies, positions and fantasies - and that's about it.  Seduction requires an attention span to culminate in a hookup.

MGAM:  That's true

FM:  The hookup apps like Grindr, Jack'd, Scruff, Growlr kill the art of seduction.  They might encourage superficial flirting.  They claim to offer a variety of men, but there's a high failure rate caused by "preferences", shunning, rudeness, abrupt ending of "conversations"....so many profiles there and online stipulate, "no endless chat or no endless emails".  Flirting and making a snap judgment are not the same as seduction.

MGAM:  Yes, you are right...[kisses FM's freshly washed feet as he massages his legs]

MGAM:  Do you think it's possible to seduce a man in a gay sauna...?  There are so many guys around looking for immediate action. They're all cruising and flirting or giving attitude

FM:  It is possible.  You're seducing me with your undivided attention and a massage.  And at some level, I'm seducing you by lying here and giving you something to look at and something to touch.  I haven't touched you - even though your massage is making me horny. 

MGAM [giggles]  Oh, you're smart....with a delicious body...I am admiring the shape of your ass...amongst other things...


4.  Choice Of Gay Saunas In Hong Kong

MGAM:  Which saunas do you prefer..?  With a body like yours, you should not have any problems with any age range...[kisses FM's ass cheeks whilst massaging the back of his thighs]

FM:  For several months I've been asking myself that question. I've written off most of them.  There are only 2 that might work for me: MyWay - which has hot guys but tons of attitude and takes forever to get action - and the revamped Soda, that I dropped into the other day after about 6 months.  I saw some favourable comments online and wanted to see for myself.  It's not bad.....it might have potential, now that it's open 24 hours.

MGAM:  Let me tell you the ones I've tried.....

I come to Galaxy regularly.  It's crappy in its decor, but everyone knows each other even if they don't play with you.  The staff are friendly and most of the customers are too.  It's mostly an older Chinese crowd, not in the best shape, but you do get white and brown foreigners and tourists too.  Sometimes you'll see younger Chinese guys.  The place gets packed on Saturday afternoons and there can be a waiting list for lockers.  They do really good business.

I did go to K K Fitness in Jordan some time ago.  The premises are old and the men are very old.  Some in their 70s and above.  It does get younger guys who are into older men.  I'm not sure if K K is still in business

I tried Birds but found it dark and depressing.  It's a play space so there's no sauna or steam room.  Very unfriendly crowd and it feels weird to me.

 I went to Big Top a few times.  It's not bad.  The staff are friendly and polite. There were mature guys there too and a good mix of other guys, including foreigners. Quite a few gym bodies.  The Dark Area can get very crowded and there are not enough rooms to play in.  I don't like playing with somebody while standing in the Dark Area.  So, while the guys can be cute, I'm not sure what to make of that place.

I've heard about the customer attitude in MyWay.  The staff are fine and polite.  The local Chinese guys there are good looking but can be very hostile.  As a mature person without a gym body, I didn't have much luck.

I went to Arena once and was horrified. 

I went to Chaps too but just didn't like it.

Gateway works very well for me.  It had a reputation for being dead, but now it is getting more people, including white guys.  I have got action there a few times even on weekday evenings.

FM:  Seems you know your saunas

MGAM:  Would you like to turn over and I'll massage the front of your body..?

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Nearly Raped By A Deaf Gay Guy

Turning around to see who had called his name while navigating a chronically packed street here in Very Rich Megacity yesterday evening, FuelMix recognized a gym-fit 20 year old local college GAM with whom he'd had some casual conversations and fun times in the sauna.  The GAM looked breathless and in shock.

FM:  Are you alright..?  You look a bit strange...what happened to your face..?

GAM:  I nearly got raped....

FM:  Where...?

GAM:  [names sauna].  I've just come from there.  Look...[shows FM fresh scratches on his arms, chest,  face and abs]

FM: What happened..?

GAM:  I had already changed and had wrapped my towel around me.  I was sitting near the Locker area to see who would come in.  A young Chinese guy came in, about my height, wearing glasses, probably around my age or a bit older.  He looked fit ,cute, a little bit nerdy and smiled at me.  So I smiled back and watched him undress.  His body was OK and he was looking at me and smiling a lot.  I wasn't cruising him, but he was really staring at me.  I knew he wanted to play with me, but I hadn't made up my mind.

He changed and went for a shower.  I was still sitting there when he got back and he kept looking at me. I still hadn't decided whether I wanted to play with him, so I got up to walk around.  He followed me everywhere I went.

I was standing against the wall in the Dark Area and he came up to me and started stroking my body. I didn't say anything and he didn't say anything.  There was nothing to indicate that he was deaf - there was no hearing aid or anything in his ear.  I dunno.....maybe he had removed it in the Locker Area and I hadn't noticed.  He never said "Hi", or anything and neither did I.

He started to kiss my body and it felt good, so I let him do it.  He was licking my balls and my legs, stroking my body.  I thought maybe he was a bottom.  We didn't speak at all.

After licking and kissing my bod, he took me by the hand to one of the rooms.  When he removed his towel, I was impressed by the size of his cock.  He never indicated what he wanted to do or whether he was "One" [Top] or "Zero" [Bottom].  I didn't say anything because he immediately got on his knees and started servicing me, the same way he was doing in the Dark Area.  He was licking me everywhere and it felt really good.  He never said anything, just licking me quietly.

Then he motioned with his fingers that he wanted to fuck me.  I told him I was Top - and that's when things turned nasty.  He suddenly got up and turned me around, trying to bend me over.  I said "No" and repeated that I was a Top.  He pushed me up against the wall, trying to fuck me. I pushed him back, shook my head, said "No thanks", and attempted to leave the room.

I unlocked the door and he slammed it shut, locking it again.  He blocked the door with his body and  turned to face me looking really angry.  Funny noises started coming from his mouth and I thought at first he was retarded......then I realized he was deaf.  He pushed me up against the wall and tried to force me to the floor on my back so he could fuck me.  We started struggling.  He was getting quite physical and aggressive, making funny wailing noises while blocking my moves to stay on my feet and get out of the room.

We struggled quite a bit as I attempted to get rid of him and stay on my feet.  He blocked the door several times, even after I'd unlocked it.  His strength for a deaf guy was astonishing and that's how I got scratched on my face and body.  I was angry and frightened. Several times he slammed me against the wall, trying to get me to collapse on the floor.  I raised my voice frequently in Cantonese and told him to leave me alone and let me get out of the room.

People in the Dark Area heard that something was going on. I heard them making comments in Cantonese that something appeared to be wrong, but nobody tried to assist me by knocking on the door and asking if I needed help.

I was getting really stressed in there.  My heart was racing.  This nerdy, deaf guy had the strength of a gorilla.  Nobody was helping me and he was refusing to let me get out of the room.  He had got it into his head that he was going to fuck me and wouldn't take "No" for an answer.  We fought some more. I realized I had to stay as close to the door as possible and not allow him to push me to the floor or towards the back of the room.

Then I got angry.....I grabbed him by the neck by one hand and started kicking the door repeatedly so people outside could hear something was wrong.  He was using one of his hands to block the door lock so I couldn't unlock it.  I started yelling in Cantonese, "let me get out...!!"  He started making loud wailing noises like a deaf guy does, and fighting with me with his fist.

I finally got his hand off the door lock, unlocked it, opened the door and kicked the door into him, forcing him into a corner.  He was wailing loudly and hitting the door in anger.

I was out of the room and in the Dark Area corridor.  There were people standing around looking at me and muttering to each other.  Nobody came forward to ask if I was OK.  I wasn't.  I pointed to the room and said in Cantonese, "that guy is dangerous, be careful".

I was sweating, my heart was racing and I had scratches on me.  It wasn't until I got to the Locker Area and looked in the mirror that I saw the scratches on my face.  I was horrified and pissed off.  I had a shower, got dressed and left.

WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO TELL MY PARENTS WHEN THEY SEE THE SCRATCHES ON MY FACE.....??!!  THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW I'M GAY...!!  HOW CAN I EXPLAIN THIS TO THEM..??!!  IT'S SO OBVIOUS I'VE BEEN IN A FIGHT.....!!  I CAN'T MAKE A REPORT TO THE POLICE WITHOUT DISCLOSING WHERE IT HAPPENED AND OUTING MYSELF.

WHAT AM I GONNA DO WHEN I GET HOME..??!!  I'M NOT READY TO COME OUT TO MY PARENTS...I'M JUST NOT...!!  HOW CAN I TELL THEM THAT I'M GAY AND SOME GUY TRIED TO RAPE ME..??!!  THEY WILL THROW ME OUT...!!  I KNOW THEY WILL...!!

FM:  [remains silent, not knowing what to say]

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In Praise Of Older Men

FuelMix in conversation with a 20-something better-than-average-gym-bod local GAM who gave his views on his "preference":

It's obvious that I have a gym bod and I'm not afraid to flaunt it.  If I go to saunas like Hutong, it takes forever to get action.  These other muscle boys stare at everyone but stand around leaking attitude with a grim expression on their faces.  OK, the action can be wild, but, fuuucck.....it takes so long 'coz they're all pretending they're not interested and they're just too hot for you.

With Big Top, My Way, Jungle, it's pretty much the same thing.....attitude, attitude, attitude.  After a while, you question what you're paying for and why you have to wait so long to get it.

What I discovered about older guys - whether GAM or GWM - is that they don't waste time when they're cruising you.  They make it very obvious they want you.  Is it desperate...? Who knows...?  I'm a Top and a lot of older guys are Bottoms.  They're not in the best physical shape, they're nothing to look at and they know it.  I get annoyed when these flabby GWMs just assume I'm a Bottom and then mutter under their breath when I tell them I'm a Top. That's one of the reasons I stopped going to Central Escalator.  Fuckin' hairy, fat, white guys giving me attitude.  Forget it.

So most of the time, I play with older GAMs.  They can be very humble and very grateful at the same time.  It's quite touching actually, how they compliment my bod, stroke me, kiss me.  They love to service and I love getting serviced.  And when I fuck them, they moan and scream like little Japanese teenagers.  Makes me giggle.

I don't mind if they want me to cum in their mouth or on their face.  I've had some explosive orgasms with these older guys - which is not what I was expecting.  Sometimes we swap numbers and occasionally I've hooked up with the same guy more than once in the sauna.

The more I think about it, the more I enjoy these older GAMs aged 50 and up.  The oldest GAM I played with in the sauna was 71 and wow.....!! He was an amazing cocksucker...!!  I was really banging his face. I found that the more I played with older GAMs, the less I cared about what they looked like.  I was just pleasantly surprised how quickly I would get action from them.  I could get my rocks off with 3 or 4 older guys in the sauna and leave, pretty satisfied with the servicing.  Meanwhile those other "really hot muscleboy" GAMs were still standing around looking grim and giving attitude.

But there's something else I noticed.  The older GAMs don't do drugs the way the younger GAMs do.  Some do Poppers, but in my observation, it's not to the same extent as these 20 and 30-something GAMs that combine Poppers, cigarettes and Viagra all night long in the sauna.

The older GAMs seem to be more aware of their health.  Or maybe, they're more aware of their mortality.  Some are obviously married with kids my age, or even grand kids.  They may have some other health problems due to their age.  I know that some take Viagra, 'coz they told me, but other than that, I don't see or suspect the drug use that I definitely know goes on with the younger GAMs.  I doubt whether the older GAMs in this town are on cocaine, ecstasy, crystal meth like the younger ones are.

In a funny way, I feel reassured when I fuck older GAMs.  I don't feel like I'm fucking a drug cocktail or a health hazard and I know I won't get attitude.  I wanna make it clear I'm talking about Hong Kong older GAMs.  I don't touch older Mainland Chinese GAMs.

The only drawback is that I have to show up in places like Galaxy in Tsim Sha Tsui, or KK Fitness in Jordan or QQ Fitness in Wanchai.  They're not the best looking saunas, but that's where the older guys are.  Some also show up in Birds in Tsim Sha Tsui or Gateway in Wanchai which is OK.  If I get cruised on the street by an older GAM, I'll usually suggest Gateway, Birds or Galaxy. I hope older GAMs will also show up in Soda.

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Blue Balls, Blue Moods

On an overcast evening downtown, FuelMix bumped into an attractive face and body which he instantly recognized and from whom he was happy to receive a hug.

"FuelMix, I am soooo depressed...!!"  sighed the muscular GAM Personal Trainer, with whom FuelMix had fond memories of playing in the sauna, in stairwells and in abandoned urban buildings awaiting renovation, "I'm not happy going to the saunas these days...there's no good energy..!!"

FM:  Yeah, I know...I feel the same way.  I have written off so many saunas

GAMPT:  Even coming to Tsim Sha Tsui is disappointing. This is the centre of town but Galaxy is hideous with fat, ugly people or old guys from Mainland China, Birds is dark with skinny, ugly people and Arena.....is a disaster.

FM: [giggling]:  So true.  Yesterday evening, some guy cruised me on the street in TST and suggested Galaxy. I said I would only show up if he gave me the cash now to pay the fee on the way out 'coz I had written the place off.  He gave me the cash, we went in, I got serviced, used his cash to pay on the way out.

GAMPT [in mock righteous tone]:  You little hustler...!!

FM [laughing]:  Hey...!!  I didn't make any money outta the guy.  Just used his cash to pay what I would have had to pay to the Front Desk.

GAMPT:  Do you know I've stopped to going to Hutong..?

FM:  Why..? With a body like yours..?

GAMPT:   The official entry fee is about HK$230.00.  I never used to pay that in the past, since I always got a discount.  I didn't show up for a couple of months because I was working and then last week when I went, the guy asked me to pay HK$230.00.  I told him I was never asked to pay this amount before and he just shrugged and said I had to pay HK$230.00.  I got angry and left.  I'm not going back.

FM:  Ouch...

GAMPT:  I went to Big Top in the past but didn't like it.  Alexander has now closed.  So for me, there is nothing in Mong Kok or Tsim Sha Tsui.

FM:  What about My Way in Causeway Bay..? I've been there a few times, not that frequently.  The manager asked why I don't show up more often.  The guys there are good looking, but sometimes it can take a while to get action

GAMPT:  Yes....that is now the only sauna I show up at on weekends.  It has good looking local guys, not so many Mainland Chinese.  It does take a while to get action.  

FM:  I've been to My Way on weekdays between 5pm and 8pm and there were interesting people there.  They have nice bodies but there can be a lot of attitude. 

GAMPT: I'm getting so fed up of attitude in the saunas.....To be honest, I'm getting fed up of being gay.  You can't meet the right guys online, you can't meet the right guys on the street,  you can't meet the right guys in the sauna.....and if you don't do drugs or clubbing, you have even less chance.  It's so frustrating.....I'm watching all this media shit about Hong Kong hosting the Gay Games in 2022 and I'm thinking, "Whatever...... why don't they have "Good Manners For Gay Men" as one of the sports...?? or "The One Hour Drug-Free Challenge..??"  Who gives a fuck about these guys swimming, running and dragon-boating..??

FM:  Yeah....I get angry and fed up too.  Sometimes I get asked why I don't have a BF and I just point and say, "Have you seen the shit that's out there..??!!"  I'm not paying attention to the Gay Games either.  I suspect Hong Kong will get it, but it still looks like a Pride Parade With A Locker Room 

GAMPT [laughs]:  I'm surprised those fags will even come out of the Locker Room..!!  Think of all the underwear and jock-strap sniffing, the group jack-offs, fucking in the toilets, cocksucking in the showers....

FM:  Those are the REAL Gay Games..!! 

GAMPT [laughing]:  Gimme a hug studboy...!! I gotta get to the gym and train some fat white guy.  I charged him more because he bores me.....[hugs FuelMix and gives him a quick kiss on the cheek.  Old Chinese lady walking past, smiles].


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Lamentations In The Sauna

"It's not fair..!!" whined the GAM in the sauna, "how come YOU get all the looks and the attention..??  Everybody is ignoring me - and the place is soooo crowded on Saturday evening...!!"

FuelMix: I'm not sure.....maybe because I look different to the others. Just a non-Chinese novelty. Maybe  they're curious. I dunno.....I'm just another customer who paid to be here.

GAM:  Hah..!!  They're NOT curious about YOU..!! They WANT you..!!  Four of them watched you when you were getting undressed....even the staff on the Reception Desk smiled at you and said in Cantonese to the other guys to look at you...!!  Did you hear that...??!!

FM: Umm... no....I wasn't listening, I was nowhere in the vicinity

GAM:  They all touch your smooth skin.....they all like your body.....they touch you when you walk by.....they follow you.....and you just smile......that young guy......he just came up to you and kissed your face...!!  You know him..??

FM: No, I don't....

GAM:  He just kissed you and smiled and walked away....!! You tell me you don't know him..??!!

FM: That's the truth.  I don't know him.  But I'm grateful he kissed me [grins].

GAM:  It's NOT fair..!!  I'm just too ugly to get noticed.  I just sit here every time I show up and feel sooo sad...!!.  Guys like you can just walk in and you do NOTHING and people notice you.

FM:  Gay men can be very cruel.  I have been ignored and rejected so many times because of my looks and my race - and not just by Asian guys.  You should see the behaviour of white guys in their own countries.

GAM:  Why are gay men so cruel..?

FM:  Because gay culture is artificial.  It is based on looks and cock size. The image of perfection is very narrowly defined.  The truth is many gay men - whatever their age -  can't get beyond appearance.  It has trapped them in two ways...Firstly, Vanity that they're sooo hot and secondly, Fear that they'll lose their looks.

GAM:  But how come YOU get action so easily..?

FM:  Because I don't care whether I get it or not.  And I don't care about the compliments.

[A Sauna staff member walks by and gives FM 2 sweets and a condom]

GAM:  You don't CARE about the compliments..??!!  But YOU get sooo many..!!  They are complimenting you right now in Cantonese and come up and tell you in English..!!  Whaddya mean you don't care..??!!  That staff guy just gave you sweets and a condom....!! He totally ignored me..!! I've NEVER seen him do that before - and I come here more often than you..!!

FM:  Look, I don't know what the motive is of that staff member and I don't care.  The trick is to politely and in a neutral way, accept the attention.  Just show some good manners.  I'll tell you a dirty secret.....gay men will say anything to get to your cock - and they will gossip like hell.  And that gossip can be good or malicious.  That's why I don't care because I can't control it. 

GAM:  You have an advantage because you're handsome and you have muscles.

FM:  According to whom...?  The current crowd..??  What happens if a new crowd came in and totally ignored me....what would you say to me then..??

GAM:  But I know I am ugly.....and I have no more sperm to ejaculate any more.  Nothing....I am 45 years old and I can't get hard any more and I have no more sperm. I can't cum anymore.  That's why I just sit here and feel so sad.

FM:  You should see a doctor or a sexual therapist.  As men age, their sperm counts drops and so does the amount of cum.  But that doesn't mean you can't have good sex or get hard.  If you had a physical check up and a good talk, you would understand more about your body.  You are linking getting hard with cumming.  They are separate.  There should not be anything stopping you from getting horny and performing sexually - assuming there are no other physical problems.

GAM:.....Except my ugliness.....

FM:  No comment.

GAM:  How come you know so much about gay men..?  You seem very cool and relaxed about all the attention you're getting.  Who taught you about gay men..?

FM:  Mostly my observations and thinking.  Some research, I guess...

GAM [laughs]:  You should write about what you know of gay men.  You could help people...

FM:  **rolls eyes**

-----------------------------------

See also:

• Just Like Me 1
• Just Like Me 2
• Just Like Me 3

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In Defence Of Monogamy 3

The other day, FuelMix dropped into the University of Fag Bar (pending accreditation). Ordering a drink and finding a comfy perch, FuelMix scanned the joint, looking for blog material.

A tame fag, with whom FuelMix was peripherally acquainted, made eye contact. When beckoned, he came trotting over, wagging his tail. After the usual pleasantries (during which FuelMix's crotch was repeatedly fondled), the fag sat next to FuelMix, looking jittery and agitated.

FM: Something on your mind?

Fag: Yeah, can’t figure out my BF

FM: Didn’t know you had one

Fag: I don’t know if I have one.......he’s forever sleeping around and bragging about it. Makes me uncomfortable

FM: How long you been together?

Fag: A few years

FM: What’s the deal on sleeping around?

Fag: Dunno………..we can’t discuss it. We just end up fighting, he storms out, fucks around, comes home later, starts bragging about it.

FM: You sleep around?

Fag: Kinda – but not as much as him. Thing is, I can’t trust him anymore. When we’re having sex, I can’t trust him. Emotionally, I can’t trust him. Sometimes I’m scared for my health. But we can’t even talk about it without him storming out and fucking somebody else.

FM: You’ve put up with this for a few years?

Fag:Yeah, it’s getting kinda tiring

FM: What’s in it for you?

Fag: Well….I guess I can say I have a BF. Not much else

FM: You scared to confront him?

Fag: Yeah, he’s younger than me and drinks heavily, especially after one of his revenge fucks

FM: So….there’s infidelity, an inability to talk about it……..and the threat of physical abuse?

Fag: I think so……….I wanna end it but don’t know how. I think I would have preferred monogamy but we can’t even discuss it. I don’t think I’m in love anymore. I just don’t know where I stand with him. He’s happy with things as they are, I’m miserable. I’m beginning to hate myself.

FuelMix finished his drink and left.

Originally published 16 June 2009
Republished 16 October 2014 | 14 March 2017

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In Defence Of Monogamy 2

One of the depressing things when engaging the generic urban fag in conversation, is the cynical flippancy with which they treat their (apparently) significant relationships. 

This flippancy cuts right across educational, class, financial and professional boundaries. Time and time again, the Significant Other is described in a way that suggests he is an acquisition, liable to depreciate in value and open to disposal or trade-in. 

Worse, the relationship comes across as a lingering series of half-truth milestones, assumed or actual deceit, an awkward convention of mutual censorship of “don’t ask don’t tell” or a one-way street of cheque writing. 

There seems to be no attempt by fags to change the way things are. This kind of crippled “relationship” frequently confers bragging rights and the acceptance of other fags – many of whom are in exactly the same position. For some bizarre reason, the fag in the “relationship” is thought of as “stable” and “responsible”. 

FuelMix finds it insane. A relationship is a sacred contract. The term “sacred” has nothing to do with religious dogma. It has everything to do with how much and how seriously 2 men are prepared to invest of themselves physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. 

A relationship is a commitment. And FuelMix has said several times in this blog that fags are shit scared of commitment because the fag lifestyle is one of shallow hedonism. The longer the party lasts and the later is gets, the better everyone looks. 

Torn between a lifestyle of (repetitive, unhealthy) carnal and chemical distractions and gnawing chronic loneliness, the fag compromises at every step. The reasoning goes like this: 

“Yeah, I’m horny so I’ll go to the sauna, fuck my brains out, smoke some crack and weed, do some poppers and maybe I might find someone significant there too. It doesn’t have to be monogamous coz we both met in the sauna right...? We could date and he could move in, or maybe not, but it has to be like………totally open……. coz I’m not ready to commit……but it would be nice to have someone to go to Jerry’s place with on Saturday…..and I’m thinking of going to Bangkok or Puerto Vallarta and I don’t know anybody there……..maybe if he has some money he could pay for both of us……..so we’ll just say that we’re good friends, but kinda “committed”…OMG!! What the fuck does that mean?............ 

Exactly. 

What the fuck does it mean? Nothing actually. There’s no contract, there are no parameters, there’s no investment. But when the fag shows up – alone – at the University of Fag Bar (pending accreditation), he’ll bad mouth the other guy for as long as the drinks keep coming. And all the other idiots will nod and consider him “stable” and “responsible”.

Originally published 14 July 2008

Republished 31 December 2013 | 16 October 2014 | 14 March 2017

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In Defence Of Monogamy 1

FuelMix was chatting to a well educated, well travelled fag who enquired whether FuelMix had ever had a Significant Other. FuelMix replied (truthfully) that he had had only one, which lasted just over 2 years. Even though FuelMix and his SO were several hundred miles apart (but in the same time zone) and physically saw each other once a month, they kept in contact several times a day. The relationship was monogamous by prior agreement. It broke up for reasons not connected with fidelity, but as a result of each party's professional ambitions -and FuelMix's desire to return to Asia - that would have massively increased the physical distance and time zones between them.

Fag was incredulous and leery. He was visibly disgusted that FuelMix would even mention the obscenity of monogamy. 

“That’s just too restrictive...!!”, fag declared “no man in his right mind would buy into that deal...!! Who wants to be monogamous..? It’s just too much trouble and besides, he probably lied to you the whole time...!!”. 

FuelMix took a long hard look at the fag, realizing that in his short sentence, fag had gone from being mildly attractive to downright repugnant. There’s a lot that FuelMix can say in defence of monogamy which will in due course, unfold in this blog. 

Looking at the fag, trapped in his own paradigm of distrust, FuelMix was reminded of the following:

• There are some fights you get into coz you know you’re gonna win;

• There are some fights you don’t get into coz you know you’re gonna lose;

• There are some fights that are just not worth getting into;

FuelMix shrugged and excused himself.

Originally published 30 November 2007

Amended and Republished 12 December 2013 |  16 October 2014 | 14 March 2017

Copyright © 2006 – 2017 FuelMix All Rights Reserved 

Drunk And Horny In The Alley

"Oh man...", groaned the 30-something slim GAM in English reeking of cheap lager, "I am soooo horny..!!.....but I can only suck cock when I've been drinking beer..."  He had cruised FuelMix on the streets of SoHo here in Very Rich Megacity and had followed him into an alley.  It was just after 7pm on a Saturday evening.

"That explains the bloodshot eyes...?" enquired FuelMix

"Heheheheh yeah..." slurred the GAM, his head tilting violently to the left. It was obvious he was drunk and couldn't look straight ahead.  His eyes rolled upward as he staggered, narrowly missing the 2 plump rats that scampered by.

"You should sit down.  You might hurt yourself", said FuelMix

"Why don't YOU sit down..?" slurred the GAM in a slightly leery tone.  Another plump rat scampered by.

"I'm not the one who's drunk", replied FuelMix

" No......I meant why don't YOU sit on MY face..?" mumbled the GAM, his head bowed, "you know...here...right here. Nobody can see us..."  He pointed to an alcove in the alley, big enough for 3 people which was hidden by debris, stacked cardboard boxes and assorted alley junk.

"I'm not into rats", said FuelMix.

"I'm into YOU...!!" slurred the GAM trying to grin and focus, "you have a hot body..!!" He started licking his lips and stroking his crotch...

"How many beers have you had?" enquired FuelMix.

"I dunno.....about 9 or so..." muttered the GAM staggering slightly, "I have to drink before I can suck cock..."

"Why..?" asked FuelMix

"So I can deny all knowledge of sucking a guy.....I dunno if I'm gay or what.....all I know is that I love cock and swallowing cum.....it's what I live for after I've been drinking.....I dunno if I'm gay, man.....no fuckin' clue.....just need cock and cum.....like now..!!"

He fell to his knees directly in front of FuelMix, resting his face in FuelMix's crotch, inhaling deeply and gently kissing FuelMix's shorts.

"C'mon man.." he begged, "take it out...feed this boy your load..!!"

"You're too fuckin' drunk" said FuelMix, "you'd probably puke up all over my cock..."

"Duuuuude...." slurred the GAM still kneeling in front of FuelMix, his face still buried in the crotch of FuelMix's shorts while kissing his semi-hardening cock, "I'm an investment banker....bankers can buy anything with cash including a friend..."  He reached into his back pocket, fished out a wallet, pulled out 300 bucks and waved it at FuelMix, gently licking FuelMix's cock through his shorts.

"Investment banker huh..?" sneered FuelMix as a 4th plump rat scampered by in the evening shadows of the darkened alley, "You're already in the company of your friends, buddy.  Pay them."

FuelMix moved to one side.  The kneeling GAM fell face first into a pile of cardboard boxes, still clutching his cash.

FuelMix turned and walked out of the alley.

Copyright © 2006 – 2016 FuelMix All Rights Reserved 

Talking To Adam 13 - Part 5

Cruising Hong Kong In 1985

An Oral Gay History Of Hong Kong 

Written in 2016 For The First Time

A GWM IN HIS MID-60s REMEMBERS:

NOTE:  We do not encourage any form of public indecency or illegal behaviour.  We are simply reporting one person's recollections from 1985.

8. Hong Kong 1985:  Cruising Harbour City

1.   In 1985, Harbour City was COMPLETELY DIFFERENT to what it is today. Many younger guys have no idea that it has been renovated and expanded 2 or 3 times since it opened in about 1982.  Hell, many younger gay guys in town, weren't even born in 1982 or were just toddlers in 1985.

2.   What really made Harbour City famous for gay guys in the 1980s, was Ocean Centre.  This opened about 1975 and what you see today inside, looks nothing like the original.  The interior, whilst still keeping its circular shape was narrower, cramped and the ceilings were pretty low.  Although it had good quality shops, it was not as high end or glam as it is today.

3.   But it was the toilets in Ocean Centre that had gay men and tourists talking in 1985.....they were massively cruisy.  They were getting the office crowd from Star House, Ocean Centre, the offices of Harbour City like World Finance Centre and of course the tourists not just from the hotels in Tsim Sha Tsui (who already knew about Middle Road Park) but also the tourists from the then Hong Kong Hotel, The Marco Polo Hotel and The Prince Hotel.  There were all ages, nationalities and body types and the action was incredible.

4.   What made Ocean Centre and Harbour City so popular with gay men in 1985 was the fact that there were so many toilets to choose from on the different levels.  If you met someone in Ocean Centre, then you would head to the very discreet and isolated toilets of Harbour City.  The standing joke was that those toilets had been deliberately designed by gay men for gay men.  It is no exaggeration to say that in 1985, every toilet in Ocean Centre and Harbour City was seeing action.  None of the toilets there had full time Attendants like they do now and they were open till about 10:30pm.

5.   Not only that, but you would meet cute guys who had the keys to their office toilets upstairs and of course around 8:30pm onwards, that would be the perfect time to go upstairs with them  to their toilets because the entire floor would be deserted.  I did that several times and on some occasions, there were groups of us.  It was very safe and discreet.

6.   Unfortunately, there were no mobile phones then and so it was very hit and miss whether you'd see them again.  Not everyone was comfortable giving out their office number, but some were.

7.  It's hard for some people to imagine or believe just how hot some of the guys were in 1985.  Since the gym culture was taking off, there was no shortage of local and overseas muscle boys and personal trainers who were cruising around Ocean Centre and Harbour City, plus gym built white guys with seriously good bodies.  Of course, the local Chinese knew all about the place too and at the time, were really into foreign guys.  One time, I met this amazing muscled Chinese dancer in his mid-20s.  This boy had the body of a god and was turning heads as he was walked through Ocean Centre in skimpy gym shorts and a tank top, showing off his hard work in the gym.  Turns out he was a dancer from the City Contemporary Dance Company and a Total Top.  Fine by me.  Whenever he would show up at Ocean Centre, there would be this line of 7 or 8 guys just following him around into every toilet in Harbour City.  Of course, he frequently got invited to the more private office toilets upstairs where he was a total exhibitionist while several guys serviced him.  It was like watching a porn movie.

8.  Those were really amazing times and the guys you would run into were less flaky.  There was this unwritten code of discretion. It's no exaggeration to say that many gay men were grateful that Ocean Centre and Harbour City existed.  Frankly, it kept them from going absolutely insane.

Copyright © 2006 – 2016 FuelMix All Rights Reserved 

Talking To Adam 13 - Part 4

Cruising Hong Kong In 1985

An Oral Gay History Of Hong Kong 

Written in 2016 For The First Time

A GWM IN HIS MID-60s REMEMBERS:

NOTE:  We do not encourage any form of public indecency or illegal behaviour.  We are simply reporting one person's recollections from 1985.

7. Hong Kong 1985:  Cruising Tsim Sha Tsui And Harbour City

Tsim Sha Tsui

1.   In 1985, the place to go was the Middle Road Park *** next to the Mariner's Club and opposite the Middle Road Multi-storey carpark.***

2.   Wow..!! You didn't even need to walk around and cruise ....all you had to do was sit on any of the benches facing the toilet that was in the corner facing Salisbury Road and the guys would come by.

3.   There were all sorts of men from young local twinks, to mature Chinese and whites, to very sexy 20- something Pakistani guys (some of whom would let you suck them for cash), young white guys living here and of course tourists.  It was amazing just how many tourists knew about this place.  Rumour was they had found out from the gay Flight Attendants.

4.   That park was open 24 hours and was really famous.  It's location was excellent for tourists, walking distance from the hotels in Harbour City, The YMCA, The Peninsula, (The Kowloon Hotel was under construction in 1985), The Sheraton, The Ambassador Hotel ***, The Imperial Hotel, The old Hyatt Hotel ***, The Holiday Inn Golden Mile, Chungking Mansions and all the recently opened hotels in Tsim Sha Tsui East, plus the New World Hotel*** and the Regent Hotel***.  Those 2 hotels were connected to the park via an overhead footbridge that spanned Salisbury Road.***

FuelMix says:

(1)  The Middle Road Park was demolished to make way for MTR East Tsim Sha Tsui Station, Exit K.  A new park was built on a podium above the station.  Entrance is via a staircase on the corner of Middle Road and Salisbury Road.

(2)  The Middle Road Multi-storey carpark was demolished and as at February 2016, is a construction site for a commercial, retail and hotel (?) tower.

(3)  The Ambassador Hotel used to stand on the corner of Middle Road and Nathan Road, across from the Sheraton Hotel.  It was demolished and is now the site of 26 Nathan Road, a commercial building.

(4)  The old Hyatt Hotel on Nathan Road was demolished and is now the site of I-Square. The new Hyatt Hotel is located in K11.

(5)  The New World Hotel on Salisbury Road was demolished and as a February 2016, is a construction site for a commercial, retail and hotel tower.

(6)  The Regent Hotel is now known as The Inter-Continental and as at February 2016 is due for renovation or demolition.

(7)  The Footbridge from the park that connected with the New World Hotel was demolished.  A new footbridge was constructed from the Podium-Level of the Park to the Tsim Sha Tsui Waterfront Promenade. It remains to be seen whether, as part of the redevelopment in that area, a new footbridge will also link the hotels under construction.

COMING UP IN PART 5:  8.  Cruising Harbour City
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