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FuelMix - ATTITUDE AND ILLUMINATION

FuelMix   - ATTITUDE AND ILLUMINATION

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Tuesday, September 06, 2011

Rainbow High

The “lifestyle” has inherent hedonism. From bronzers to glow sticks, cockrings to circuit parties, pumping at the gym to cruising downtown. It’s a high stakes game with a twist of hypocrisy. Even those claiming to be “non-scene” are looking to “be seen” – penis enlargement exercises that show thru the Diesel jeans, repeated references to “model looks” or “straight looking, straight acting” or looking to meet on webcam.

As fags are fond of saying, “So many men, so little time”. The pursuit of urban male hedonism and cheap technology as a means of finding men, quickly become compulsive. Fags are early adaptors of both. Now think about this: it is a universal principle that for every action, there is a reaction. If fags are in a heady pursuit of sexual pleasure, it can only mean one thing – they’re avoiding pain in one or more areas of their lives.

Not convinced..? Why then, the constant references to “No Strings Attached”..? A clear reference to actual or potential pain avoidance. Moreover, fags are seasoned travellers, well versed in finding men in any city. There's no shortage of action. With all the muscular attractions, why do they have chemical addictions as part of sexual hedonism..?

The answer is an ironic paradox. For all their erogenous zones and creative sexuality, deep inside, many fags have shut down a part of their psyche that is steeped in emotional pain. That pain is the result of some human interaction, or leftover baggage. The multiple NSA encounters are compulsive and automatic, fucking and sucking in a state of trance. It guarantees a level of sensation without emotional resonance.

The problem is, the deeper the pain, the greater the level of sensation needed to suppress it. When the usual compulsive sexual rush isn’t enough, it’s time to reach for the chem du jour to guarantee the "hit".

And so the cycle repeats. Sex and drugs compound on each other. Progressively heavier levels of both are required to get a more powerful “rush” each time to ease the emotional pain.

The loop is easy to see: pain, hedonism, obsession, addiction, pain. Ever wondered why so many urban fags claim to have so many  "friends", while avoiding emotional attachment and yet... are utterly hostile to other fags while being “chem friendly” as they're sucking or being sucked..?

Originally published 15 May 2006
Amended and Republished 6 September 2011 | 7 August 2018

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