Hit Me

Munching on sandwiches in the park and musing about being a legend in his own lunchtime, FuelMix’s digestive reverie was interrupted by a looming shadow…..

Raising his eyes, FuelMix recognized an impeccably dressed Middle Aged English Fag who had in the past, attempted to cruise FuelMix in the sauna only to be given the brush-off.

“Hello!” exclaimed the Middle Aged English Fag brightly, “I believe we met before at ******?” His ruddy complexion and ludicrously yellow British teeth were strangely compatible with the autumn foliage, even in a tropical place like Very Rich Megacity.

“HHMMfff….” gulped FuelMix attempting to be polite while navigating a pate and tomato sandwich that was stuck to the roof of his mouth.

“Oh…..is this a bad time…?” enquired the Middle Aged English Fag crisply.

“HHHMMffff….” responded FuelMix pointing to his mouth, his lower jaw moving furiously like a chewing camel in an attempt to re-gain his luncheon etiquette.

“Ah…you’ve got your tongue around something”, sneered MAEF, “funny, all this time I heard you were a Top and preferred to be serviced…”

FuelMix swallowed (the sandwich), looked directly at MAEF and asked, “from whom?”

MAEF: Oh, you know, word gets around…you were pointed out in the sauna….I’d already noticed you, but you weren’t interested at the time.

FM: I can’t control sauna gossip.

MAEF: Are you into corporal punishment? Not to be direct, I think you’re quite fascinating. I like being beaten and I know you’re a Top.

FM: What do you have in mind?

MAEF: Well as you can probably tell, I’m a product of the English Public School. I was beaten mercilessly as a teenager by the staff and by the other boys. After a while it became quite erotic for me, especially when the rich foreign boys with those exotic features used to have a go at me – just because they could.

FM: So that’s your kink is it?

MAEF: Oh yes….I’m heavily into being beaten. Long sessions you know, till I’m whimpering. Safe and consensual of course. You’re foreign and you obviously have a brain and a fabulous body. You’d be perfect to put me in my place. Care to consider it? I have all the stuff. You just need to show up at my place. I spent scads of cash soundproofing one of my rooms on the pretence that I was installing a high-end audiophile system.

FM: (wiping the sandwich crumbs off his fingers): I’ll think about it

MAEF: Oh good! I was so hoping you would. By the way are you married?

FM: Are you?

MAEF: I was. Got 2 kids who aren’t thrilled that Daddy’s a queer. Of course, they haven’t a clue what I’m into.

FM: I see.

MAEF: Well, look, here’s my card, obviously not my business card, just a personal one. I give it out to likely Tops. Perhaps you’ll call?....

FM: I’ll certainly think about it.

MAEF: Ta-Ta for now handsome! (walks briskly away)

Originally published 16 November 2008
Republished 28 March 2017