No Rice, No Curry, No Blacks 1

The Sexual Racism Running Rampant Within The LGBT Community

by Yusuf Tamanna

Side headings, Numbering, underlining, bold print and highlighting by FuelMix:

1.  The Apps That Just Keep On Giving...?

1.  The issue of sexual racism is a debate that keeps on raging on amongst members of the LGBT community. Apps like Grindr and Tinder have given many of its users a platform to express their like or dislike for a certain race of people and while some may argue it’s all just a preference, most would say it is blatant prejudice.


2.  Apps Unsafe / Unwelcoming For Blacks And Minority Ethnics..? (BMEs)

2.  Requests like ‘No Blacks’ or ‘No Asians’ have become regular phrases on apps like Grindr with some users going as far as to clump different ethnic groups together based on food. ‘No Rice’ means East Asians need not apply and ‘No Curry’ lets South Asians, like myself, know that I haven’t a chance in hell. Vulgar stuff, right? Well that depends on what side of the fence you look at things. When users on Grindr who include such phrases in their profile are challenged on their inclusion of such terms, much of their defence comes back to their right to have a preference. And yes, while people are allowed to have preferences, for example I like my men not to be out-right bigots, (that’s just my preference guys!), a lot of BME [Blacks And Minority Ethnics] gay men feel that such phrases are blatant expressions of racism which render such apps yet another LGBT space not safe or welcoming for PoC. [People of Colour]

3.  “I’ve not had a lot of direct discrimination at me, but I see it all the time” Nasir Alajmi tells me, a 24 year old, Middle Eastern gay man, who uses Grindr as a way to meet new people for friendship and dating. “I don’t think I’ve ever gone on there and not looked at a profile that says something like “No Asians” or “Not into Black Guys”. People can be so blatant about it, it’s something you’d hope people don’t say in public”. 


3.  Direct And Indirect Discrimination

4.  And that’s the thing, people wouldn’t dare say such things in public, so why do users feel they get a free pass to say it on apps like Grindr and Tinder. Nasir told me he thinks it is the way Grindr is designed. “There is something about these gay hook-up apps which somewhat encourages it. Why do you have a section that says what race or ethnicity you are? What is the reason for it? I mean the fact that you can filter by ethnicity says it all really, Grindr know what they are doing. Personally, I think it would be better if they got rid of it.” 

5.  On dating apps, a person is able to have their own little shopping list of likes and dislikes in a person. Often these can range between fairly mundane requests like age groups and height but when someone starts to include race into that shopping list, that’s when things get a little blurry. “It’s just a preference! I don’t like Chinese boys so I say that- it’s not rude. If anything it’s considerate!” One guy told me when I posed the question of dating apps and racism being mutually exclusive on an app called YikYak. 


4.  GAMs 

6.  However, when I spoke to East Asian gay men they told me that they’re sick and tired of being stereotyped as men with small penises, passive and very effeminate. And because of that stereotype, a lot of gay men immediately see them as ‘less- than’. One East Asian gay man told me, “It’s very disheartening that people in our community see us this way.  I messaged a guy on Grindr once and he said he wasn’t into Asians. 6 months later I grew a beard and he was suddenly interested in me because he said I looked ‘less Asian now’- what’s that all about?” 


5.  Using Filters To Deliberately Seek Out Races

7.  It is true that users of gay dating apps, Grindr in particular, have been known to use the filter option to exclude men based on their ethnicity from their view, there is a trend of many of its users using the feature for the opposite reason. A growing number of users use the filter option have their search results only bring back men of South Asian, East Asian, Middle Eastern or Black ethnic backgrounds in what many argue is a fetishisation of people based on their race. 

8.  It’s an all too familiar scenario that I’ve found myself in when using apps like Grindr and Tinder. Being a South Asian man, I will receive messages from other Grindr users and while the conversation appears to be going well and we pass the obligatory niceties, they will always say it or allude to that one sentence that triggers me into rolling my eyes into another galaxy. 

9.  ‘Oh, you know I’m really into Asian guys!’ 

10.  “They’ve already objectified you and I don’t want to meet people like that. It doesn’t matter if that’s what you’re into. It’s not me, it’s not what defines me. I want you to be attracted to me because you’re attracted to me”. Said Nasir, who has become used to the barrage of messages he gets from other Grindr users expressing interest in him just because he is Middle Eastern.

11.  I’m usually advised not to take it so seriously and someone saying ‘I really like Asian guys!’ is seen as innocent as saying you like someone because they have long hair.  But personally, something doesn’t ring true with me when I am told that these men have a thing for men of a certain race or ethnic background.  Being South Asian becomes the primary reason why they are talking to me in the first place and it overrides any other quality I could possibly have. I could be funny, charismatic, or a great listener (all of which I am, just letting you know) but all that is irrelevant because they either can’t or choose not to see past the colour of my skin. The issue I have with that isn’t just that they’re talking to me because I am South Asian, it’s because they are talking to me because of the sexual stereotypes they associate with all South Asian men, as if all South Asian men have the same physical features and characteristics and as long as I have that- anything else about the person is just a bonus. How charming. 

12.  I can only laugh when I think back to a conversation I had with one guy, who happened to be white, telling me that he liked me because I was Asian, and when I prodded a little further he told me it was because all Asian men are rough in bed and he loved that. I don’t know where he got such an idea but he instantly thought because I am Pakistani that I must adhere to that stereotype. But such stereotyping isn’t new, it pretty much makes up the fabric of all gay and straight pornography sites with categories like ‘Rough Arab’ and ‘Big Black Cock’ all geared to viewer’s fetishes and kinks.  A lot of gay men are using dating apps like Tinder and Grindr as a way to live out their deepest, darkest fantasies.

---"No Rice, No Curry And No Blacks" - The sexual racism running rampant within the LGBT community, Yusuf Tamanna, 1 September 2016, sbs.com.au


COMING UP IN PART 2:
6.  Black Men:  Discrimination And Fetishisation 

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