I'm Clean

1.  Ever wondered why so many online fags put in that famous line “D/D free a must” or some variation thereof like, “Clean & Neg here UB2”??

2.  Simple.....  It’s a ritual – sorta like saying grace at Thanksgiving or saying “Merry Christmas”.  Nobody really means it but it’s part of the etiquette and everybody nods their approval. The reality is that given the soaring disease rates amongst fags, the line means nothing and has no business even being in an ad.    

3.  As at August 2017, Syphilis - thought to have been wiped out in the US 70 years ago and fairly easily treated - has made a roaring comeback in the Los Angeles area.  Its happy recipients..? fags, HIV types and drug users. Oh wait.....the last two categories also covers fags.

4.  And the biggest joke...?  These infected fags either turn hostile or are reluctant to disclose their sexual partners.  That's because they've been whoring around in the gay saunas, flying on drugs, going to the circuit parties or hanging out on a hookup app - simultaneously, several times a week.

5.  To stop Syphilis from spreading, ALL the sexual partners of an infected person must be tracked down, tested and treated.  It's the antithesis of casual, anonymous sex (and that's before getting into the fake names, one-time-use phone numbers, the vague locations, where they might hang out and when, the shunning, silence and no-shows for testing when they're contacted).

6.  Think about it. An ad for Casual Sex………is anything the fag going to say in it or in response to it, actually going to be “Meaningful”, particularly when fags are such accomplished liars....?  Is it that surprising that Syphilis (and antibiotic-resistant Super Gonorrhea) are affecting gay men with such vengeance..? 


Scenario 1 

1.  Let’s take a typical online scenario:   Deeply closeted married fag in his early 30s, comes to town on a business trip, claims to be a jock, goodlooking, blah blah blah, repeatedly posts his ad on Craigslist or Grindr/Jack'd/Scruff etc with torso and cock shot taken in the hotel room, comes out with the famous line, “D/D free a must”.

2.  How does he know his own status..? He’s a deeply closeted married fag.  He’s going to have to get regular STD checks from somebody other than the family physician (not such a big deal) AND disclose that he's married AND Bi (will he..?) AND make sure to keep the paperwork out of sight from the wife.  Open question whether he’d even do it.

3.  So let’s assume he doesn’t.  Is he as “D/D free” as he’s insisting the other guy should be?  In reality, he’s simply getting by without showing symptoms and he’s totally in the dark as to his carrier status on a host of bacterial and viral goodies (Untested and untreated Syphilis can hide symptoms for decades).  In other words, he’s in sexual health denial. So his insistence that the other fag should be “D/D free a must” is hypocritical.  The other fag will be in exactly the same state of sexual health denial.  2 fag hypocrites sucking and fucking off each other.

Scenario 2

1.  Let's assume the deeply closeted married fag actually has an up-to-date STD test with a certificate.  Great...!  He puts up his ad on Craigslist, Grindr/Jack'd/Scruff etc and says “D/D free a must”.  Remember it’s an ad for Casual Sex, the idiot is in town for just a few days, time is limited, he can only fuck in the evenings after work, he’s away from the wife and he’s horny.

2.  This fag has to make a strategic decision.  While HE can confidently say that he is “D/D free” can he honestly insist on “UB2”?  Should he advertise that he has an up-to-date STD certificate?  Is that gonna turn off would be fuck buddies..?  It probably will.  If he tells them in a private e-mail that he has an up-to-date STD certificate, is he implying that he wants to see one from the other fag too?  Can he demand it and stand by his demand?  Will he - given that he has limited time and he's horny..?

3.  Think about it.  His time in town is short, online ads have a high failure and frustration rate, there’s no shortage of liars, he’s horny and he’s got 2 fags that have contacted him.  He’s panicked that he’ll lose them both.   

4.  What’s he gonna do..?

5.  He’s gonna get dirty on the down low with any one of them or both of them.  He ain’t gonna give a damn about “D/D free a must”.  It’s a very, very rare fag who having advertised online, will stand by his demand and expect to see proof of status from the other fag.

Scenario 3

1.  Here’s something else to think about.  In order to hedge his bets, the deeply closeted married fag has already done gay sauna research on the city he’s heading for.  If the online ad falls through – and they usually do – or he gets his rocks off and is still horny, there’s no shortage of gay saunas he can haunt. 

2.  And his online demand about “D/D free a must”?  That just goes to hell in a gay sauna. After all, just how many fags have YOU spotted folding their STD certificates into their towel.....??

Originally published 1 November 2011.  
Amended and Republished 28 June 2012  | 12 October 2014 | 1 September 2017

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