Gay Blackmail In Hong Kong 4

9.  When A Blackmail Threat Arrives
10. Epilogue By FuelMix 


9.   When A Blackmail Threat Arrives
Courtesy of the Reader who submitted this story (with extensive additions by FuelMix)

1.  Breathe.......Just Breathe........

2.  Think Calmly, Take Your Time:

• This is where you must weigh the pros and cons of the Blackmail threat;
• How true is the story on which the Blackmail threat is based..? 
• Replay all the events carefully in your mind (or better still, make notes of them) - from the time you first made contact with the guy online or via an app, to what happened sexually, to when he left.  What was actually said and done..? 
•  Look at the online/app correspondence hard.  Is there any ambiguity....? On whose part..?
• Just how strong is his case for blackmail..?
• Exactly where did you slip up to innocently provide him with information that he's now using against you..?
• At which points can you attack his story..?

3.  What Is/Are The Threatened Consequence(s) Of The Blackmail?

• Is it a threat to go to the Police if you don't pay..?
• Is it a threat to expose you online by name, pics, address, email and phone number..?
• Is it a threat to expose you to your employers..?
• Are your employers homophobic or gay or gay-friendly..?
• Is it a threat to expose to you to your wife, GF, BF or friends..?
• All of the above..?

4.  Can You Confidentially Talk To Someone About This And Get Feedback Before Responding To The Blackmail Threat..?  Or Do You Want To Deal With This Alone..?

• Is your employer gay or gay friendly to understand that Blackmail threats happen..?
• Would you be comfortable discussing what happened with a friend or employer..?
• What about a gay counseling hotline where you can talk anonymously and get their feedback..?

5.  Can You Extract Information From Or About The Blackmailer To Make Him Think Twice..? Can You Make Him Fear You..?

• Should you go ahead and release the information about him first..?
• That might buy you more time to develop your strategy

6.  Check Your Fear Level

• The higher the level of fear you display, the higher his price will go;
• If his story is better than yours on the facts, would it be better for you to pay up now and move on..?
• What might be the future consequences if you paid him..?  Would he come back for more..?
• If his story is better than yours on the facts, can you still negotiate the amount he's demanding..?
• If your story is better than his, can you stand by it and start wearing him down until he abandons his blackmail attempt..?  Chances are he's also scamming other people at the same time.  If he senses that you're not afraid and wasting his time by fighting back, he'll disappear.

7.  Do You Want To Go To The Police First..?

• Are you comfortable with that..?
• You would be able to discover whether this guy was a serial blackmailer against whom there were convictions and police reports;
• Will your story stand up..?
• Can you handle the Police questions without throwing a hissy fit or acting like a screaming fag..?
• Do you have the guts to press charges if your story is strong..?
• Can you spare the time..?
• Can you handle the publicity if it goes to Court..?
• Could you handle the professional or personal repercussions..?

8.  Do You Need A Lawyer - Whether Your Story is Good or Weak..?


10.  Epilogue By FuelMix

There Will Always Be Cheaters And Scammers On The Web


1.  There will always be cheaters and scammers on the Web.  That is the nature of the beast, even though every aspect of a person's web use is traceable.

2.  The majority of men using online sites or mobile hookup apps are idle browsers or chronic time wasters (their own time and the time of others they string along).

3.  Other than fake stats, no-shows, rudeness, lies, the inability to properly reply to an ad and the silent treatment, the majority of gay men using online sites or mobile hookup apps are not serial blackmailers.


Fuck The Online Hookup And The Mobile App

4.  We've never been thrilled with online hookup sites or mobile hookup apps. We refuse to use Grindr, Jack'd, Scruff whatever.  We freely admit to checking Craigslist everyday for the giggle value which sometimes gives us blog material.  Sometimes we upload an ad on Craigslist, but while the (usually inadequate) responses arrive, our own failure rate of an actual hookup is very high.


Why The Gay Saunas Win Most Of The Time

5.  That's why FuelMix prefers the gay saunas: 

• Comparatively less locational risk - you're not in a hotel, hourly guest house, your place, his place; 
• No back and forth endless emails to string you along;
• They are licensed establishments;
• No need to tidy your room or your apartment beforehand;
• Pay once usually on entry (except Galaxy where you pay on your way out);
• No chance of further payments unless you show up again; 

• Your stuff is safe in a locker; 
• Everybody knows why everybody else is there;
• Less chance of being blackmailed unless you're an obvious hyprocrite like a gin-swilling pillar of the Anglican church who claims to be str8 and happily married, but is cheating on his wife by sucking cock at the glory hole;
• See and feel the merchandise right there;
• Unless you specifically show up with a money boy via a deal done beforehand, hustling in the premises is not permitted;
• Less chance of spiked drinks;

• Minimum age to get in usually 18 (although in this town, it could be argued that it should be 16).  Staff will ask to see ID if they're not sure; 
• Can get group action in far less time than it would take to organize it via a mobile app;
• In a gay sauna, you accept or reject immediately. No time wasting;
• When the sauna staff know you, they'll look out for you;
• Can't find what you're looking for..?  Go to another one. Or come back another time;
• You might actually become casual buddies and have a social life outside the sauna; 

• **(You get to contribute your sauna reviews to this blog........)**

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