Pleasuredome Sauna London

Whilst the gay sauna reviews in this blog focus on Very Rich Megacity and other Asian cities, a reader sent his observations of Pleasuredome in London, The Nanny Kingdom.

The reader was motivated to do so having read FuelMix's post, Just Dying To Play.  That post mentioned the suspicious but unexplained deaths of 2 customers in Pleasuredome.

For clarity, FuelMix added side headings:

Hi FuelMix,

I hope you had a great Christmas.  

I know your blog is primarily intended to publish reviews of Asian saunas, but I thought I would send you [a] few thoughts on Pleasuredome in London as you have mentioned it on your blog previously. As I was back in the Nanny Kingdom for the festive period I thought I would pay the place a visit last week for old times sake. Despite hailing from London, I'm slightly ashamed to say that Pleasuredome is the only London sauna I have ever been to, so I do have a certain awkward affinity with the place.

Pleasuredome’s Publicity 

As many of your readers will know, Pleasuredome made national (in the UK) headlines in November of this year after two sauna- goers were found dead at the premises in the early hours of the morning. As these deaths were almost certainly drug related (although I couldn't find this subsequently confirmed online I'm afraid), I was interested to see if the sauna had reacted in any way to this (presumably) completely unwanted attention. 


Warning Signs and Staff Patrols 

At the entrance, I saw the first signs of response to the November deaths. There is a large, prominently placed sign warning sauna goers that they should not bring illegal drugs inside (they specifically mention the two likely culprits of GHB and GBL), and that patrons would be subject to random searches by the staff. I myself was not searched but the guy in front of me was.

Inside the sauna itself, I certainly noticed the presence of the staff a lot more than I had before. They seemed to be constantly walking around, and there seemed to be a lot more thorough cleaning going on than there had been before. Inside, there were also more notices warning of the dangers of party drugs. I know these measures are hardly revolutionary, but to be fair to Pleasuredome, I'm not sure what more they can do on this and still remain a viable business. I guess they are hoping that more screening / searching of customers, more patrolling by the staff and more literature inside the venue will go some of the way to prevent tragedies occurring on their premises again. Inside the venue I didn't see anyone obviously drug fucked but then please bear in mind that I was visiting from 6pm-8pm on a Thursday evening…..hardly party central. 


Gay Rape And Sexual Assault 

As an aside, I do have to give Pleasuredome credit for several notices inside the venue concerning rape and sexual assault. To my mind, this is one of the most taboo subjects on the gay scene (perhaps you could write about this separately FuelMix...just a thought). The notices informed customers that there had been several allegations of rape and sexual assault in the sauna within the last year, and that the staff - and police- took these complaints very seriously. I was impressed with the honesty and lack of bullshit in the notices on such an unglamorous subject. 


Clientele 

As for the sauna itself; I continue to find it a strange venue. It is certainly large, and, as mentioned, relatively clean. The quality of the patrons really does run from the sublime (there always seems to be at least two or three stunningly attractive men there) to the frankly horrific. I would certainly recommend the readers of the blog to at least check it out if they are in central London and they have the time. As there is such a wide divergence of ethnicity, age, body types etc on the London sauna scene, you are bound to see something you like.

Love,
T 


FuelMix says: 

1.   Warning signs in gay saunas prohibiting drug use are nothing new. Any gay sauna would (in theory) lose its license and its managers prosecuted if it knowingly allowed its premises for the trafficking and consumption of illicit drugs.  Does that stop fags? No.  They'd simply front up at another sauna. 

2.   Further, it is well known that Front Desk Staff in gay saunas either facilitate or are complicit in chem trafficking for cash under the table.  The grim reality of urban faggotry is that its chronic behavioural code is embedded in, or is on the fringes of, illegality. It's all part of the (frequently sucidal) hedonistic party "ethic" for which one can thank Lamestream Gay Media - and the average idiot fag for being too stupid to see the game in which they're being manipulated for profit. 

3.   Gay Rape and Sexual Assault in gay saunas is not mentioned in Lamestream Gay Media (although it shows up in gay porn literature, particularly the stuff written in the 1970s). Anecdotally, FuelMix has heard that allegations of gay rape are frequently made in the context of drug use (GHB being a massive favourite).  Given that the victim and the perpetrators are usually drug-fucked, it's an open question how credible their statements to the Police would be or how they would handle cross-examination. Could the victim and the perpetrator actually handle the publicity without becoming a laughing stock?  The public perception would be.........a  gay sauna is what it is.............a gay sauna.

4.   Not to be cynical, but it would not be surprising if a gay sauna's  management pressured the victim into silience. Since gay rape and drug use tend to go together, the investigation would open a can of worms that could potentially implicate staff.

5.   Thanks for writing in.

 

Gay Sauna Bromance 2

Further to FuelMix's questions, Hong Kong Sauna Slut, who found love in the saunas, responded further.

For clarity, FuelMix has inserted his questions via bold italics into the narrative:

Whether the 2 of you are about the same age? Or if there is a large age difference?
Do you both have a similar education background?
Work-wise what kind of jobs do you have?


Some bio info might paint a more complete picture of my situation. Except for his being local and my being an expat, my boyfriend and I have nearly identical profiles. We're both gym-fit, low-key Asians in our mid-30s, university-educated and professionals - he's an architect and I'm a lawyer. Of course, when we met we had no idea we'd be so compatible.

Which sauna did you meet in?  Was in on a weekend or a weekday?

We met mid-week at Double, a fact I hate to admit because I disliked their prejudiced door policy. Yet I kept going back because, well, I'm drawn to physically hot Asian dudes. But that normally means dealing with attitude. We've all seen physically stunning guys strutting or turning up a nose at guys who express interest, and that gets boring. So when someone has a genuine or approachable air about himself, or looks self-assured without being cocky, or knows how to put together a witty or original comment, he is rare and grabs my attention. 

Too often in HK saunas I've retreated to cabins with guys who aim to be completely served, offering no affection or effort in return, all take and no give. Or, just as often, I went soft the moment they spoke, and I'm not saying they need to be fluent in English. Too many guys have nothing interesting to say, even after a decent fuck. This will sound mean, but I think for some guys the best thing coming from their mouth is the moan when they cum and then it's all downhill, literally. Whether locals or expats, narcissism rules. We can't expect deep conversation in a sauna, but sexual stimulation is more than me-first indulgence, right?

Are you Out as a committed couple to your acquaintances?  

How do you introduce each other? 

Although I was always looking for the next hottie, I guess without my knowing it at the time, I was longing for a connection, an encounter that might lead to a person who was open to a relationship. Despite my extraordinary luck in finding my current boyfriend, one challenge I'd like to share - and welcome advice on - is that he and I have different levels of being 'out'. 

My boyfriend's out to everyone but not 'in your face'. He told me he 'informed' his family one day by inviting his boyfriend at the time to a family function and let everyone draw their own conclusions. He didn't declare anything, but when asked directly, he didn't - and still doesn't - deny that he's gay. I, on the other hand, am far more cautious. Might be the lawyer in me, but I don't think it's anyone's business. I only came out to my parents a few years ago, so only they and my closest family and friends know. I don't have many gay friends as I find too many to be gossipy, bitchy and/or shallow. My boyfriend's closest mates are gay, which makes sense because he's been out since university and regularly sees these guys in HK. 

This disparity between his comfort level and mine has led to our hanging out more with his circle of friends. But when it comes to my friends and colleagues in HK, where I've lived a few years but haven't yet made close friends, I introduce him as a good friend. Because my boyfriend and I are fairly masculine (or so I'm told) nobody asks further. I know his and my different views will need to be reconciled as our circles overlap. But I only want those I trust most to know about my love life. I often think, "is my being gay really everyone's business ?"

 
Do you intend to inform your family in North America notwithstanding there is a distance buffer?

I don't plan now to introduce him to my family in North America. They seldom visit HK, and when they do, I put them in a hotel that's more spacious than my flat. A half year of dating isn't long, and he isn't pushing me to announce us, but if we reach one year I'll reconsider.   

Since you're not living together, is he comfortable staying overnite in your flat?

As it stands, my boyfriend spends as much time at my place as possible unless he has to check on his mother. Being together in my flat is the highlight of our relationship. It's great when he spends the night, leaves his things, helps me cook or just curls up with me as we watch TV. It's also hot as hell waking up with a stud wrapped around you whose sexiness comes from his caring about you as a person and whom you care about every single day.

Now that you're both committed and monogamous, would you both consider showing up at a sauna, but only playing with each other?

This leads to one more point I'd like to make, and that's about balancing our desire to be monogamous with a desire to keep things fresh. FuelMix, you know of my rather powerful urge to sample HK's finest gay men. I used to visit saunas weekly and sometimes multiple times weekly. Although that urge has virtually disappeared since meeting my boyfriend, the urge did flare up. One night in late summer we agreed to mix things up sexually with a third.

My boyfriend and I decided to visit Alexander since neither of us had been in ages. Within minutes of arriving, we spotted a guy we both fancied. My boyfriend took charge, following him to the steam room. I joined moments later, and the three of us made out there and then found a cabin, where the guy wanted to fuck us both. My boyfriend had wanted to top him, which the guy wasn't prepared to do - we thought he had said he was versatile - so I offered my slutty ass as my boyfriend and I locked lips. The guy seemed to want to get in without a condom, which we put a stop to right away. So, the guy jerked off fast and abruptly left. 

We found this experience a fitting illustration of how unpredictable it can be for a committed couple 'looking outside' for sex. Here was a guy who at first glance seemed to fit our idea of fun. But what this guy wanted versus what my boyfriend and I wanted made things tricky. That was the most recent sauna visit for both of us. We haven't ruled out a return, but for now, my boyfriend and I feel content at home, playing with, and caring for, just each other.
 

Losing It To Porn 2

At first glance, it sounds really serious........excessive porn watching..........  Those guys with PhDs and white lab coats observed 28 hetero men, average age 26, by showing them a series of porn and non-porn images and then asking them to indicate by "Yes" and "No" whether the same image had been shown to them 4 images previously.

In other words, regardless of whether the subjects were shown porn or non-porn, they were being asked to recall and recognize repeated images.

The study found:

"........a significantly greater amount of wrong answers from the men who viewed more of the pornographic images.

------Study: Watching Porn Tied To Short Term Memory Loss, CBS Vegas 17 December 2012.

OOOoohh.......and here's the kicker (underlining by FuelMix):

"The researchers believe that the findings could help psychologists and psychiatrists to better understand why Internet-porn addicts miss appointments, neglect relationships and even forget to sleep. Previous research linked the processing of sexual images with the areas of the brain that are responsible for emotion, arousal and attention."

FuelMix shrieked with laughter...........IT'S THE SAME FUCKIN' SYMPTOMS SHOWN BY ONLINE GAMERS....!!!.........ONLINE ADDICTION IS ONLINE ADDICTION N'EST-CE PAS?.........You seriously need psychologists AND psychiatrists to better understand......???!!!

And to think these PhDs in Lab Coats now want to study the link between porn and short term memory loss on subjects other than hetero young men.  Well OK.....FuelMix will save them the trouble by setting our some fundamental truths about fags and (online) porn:

1. Fags are indeed addicted to online porn;
2. Viewing online porn is a rite of passage in Faggotry; It's a natural extension of hard copy porn;
3. A fag not only views online porn, but may have a collection of porn mags and porn DVDs;
4. Porn - whether depicted or stylized in hard copy or online - forms the basis of vast chunks of Gay Business Marketing;
5. Porn to a fag is not an accessory - it's a necessity;
6. Online porn is ubiquitous in a fag's immediate surroundings: it will be on his smart phone, his tablet, his multiple PCs, on his DVD player, his Flat Screen TV, (and that's not counting the ads in the weekly or monthly free fag rag (which can also be viewed online) or the promotional literature in the clubs and bars or the multiple porn screen in the saunas, or the number of saunas with multiple porn screens that a fag might hit in a week;
7. Since porn is pervasive in his surroundings a fag loses all sense of cognisance that it might be an addiction;
8. A fag's memory is chronically impared by a smorgasbord of chems because of altered brain chemistry;
9. Yet a fag has a photographic memory when it comes to porn......he'll know exactly which password-protected folder it's in, or what device it's on;
10. A fag will instantly be able to recall whether a porn image has been shown before.  That's because so many gay porn sites are actually porn aggregators i.e. like the Drudge Report, they collect the porn from a number of sources PLUS the gay porn companies syndicate the clips to a huge number of aggregators.
11. Although a fag won't publicly admit it, the real reason they have a near-photographic memory for porn, is because they've seen the same images over and over again year after year. In fact the PhDs in lab coats would have a hard time coming up with gay porn images that the average fag hadn't already seen.!!!  Any test for short term memory loss caused by excessive porn watching would actually be skewed in favour of the fag....!!

Y'all know FuelMix is right.

Gay Sauna Bromance 1

Submitted by our occasional contributor,  Hong Kong Sauna Slut, who unexpectedly found luuuvvv in the tubs.  Here is his story:

I met my current boyfriend completely by chance at a local sauna. It was late on a summer weeknight, and perhaps like many sauna-goers out there, I was horny but also looking to unwind after a long workday. I hadn't spotted anyone who interested me that night and was just relaxing on a sofa when in walked a handsome GAM who quickly and confidently shed his clothes, revealing baby smooth skin and a lightly muscular frame - just my type.

For unknown reasons, nobody followed the guy as he made a beeline for the shower, and I, trying not to look too eager, let him go for a few minutes before I made my way to the dark area, where I thought/hoped he would go next. Sure enough, after he towelled off, he ducked inside the dark area, where I had found a good position to see him come in. He brushed past me and gave what looked like a sly smile. He came back to put a hand to my chest, and I put a hand on his abs, and before I knew it we were inside a cabin, the door locked behind us, kissing slowly and deeply on the lips and a number of other choice body parts.

After a few minutes, he asked me in Chinese where I was from. I told him, and he switched to English. Something about his directness grabbed my attention. I was alternately intrigued and turned on. He'd say something flirtatious in English, then grab my ass or pull me close, then kiss for minutes at a time, before switching back to Chinese, as if he was testing if I could keep up. I took charge a few times, pinning his back to the matted floor where we lay, and kissed and smiled and teased. We went at it like that for hours. Eventually we both fell asleep, then he awoke suddenly and said he had to go. I said the same, and we hurriedly showered and played a bit more there before dressing and exiting the sauna together.

As we descended to street level, I sensed that this was a guy I'd like to see again. I should note that I have a personal policy of not asking or giving out my phone number unless I feel strongly about another hook-up. I fell silent debating whether to give him my number or ask for his, when, as if reading my mind, he said, 'Let's plan on meeting one week from tonight.' I was charmed by the idea, but recalled that a biz trip would keep me away 10 days. So, he suggested two weeks later. We agreed and held a long sexy gaze before we parted ways.

Two weeks on, and I showed up at the same time as when we met. I honestly wondered if he was just a fast talker as I roamed about for a good 20 minutes, passing on pursuing a guy or two. But then, just as I took a seat on a sofa, he walked in, as if from a dream. We instantly made eye contact, he motioned me over, and we greeted each other in the locker area with a quick kiss before going to the shower together, then finding a cabin. More hot kissing and body contact followed, including a long 69 that almost made me explode. I then recalled that I didn't even know if he was a top or bottom as our first meeting was all kissing and chatting. He said he was versatile and I replied, 'we're definitely a match' as I am too.

That night I remember lots of soft and sensual kissing but also plenty of good conversation. We met like that once a week for the next two weeks, then agreed to exchange numbers and started meeting twice a week, then ditched the sauna as we met at my flat. It sounds cliched, but I honestly didn't look for a relationship. As far as I was concerned - and I voiced this within our first month of seeing each other - we were sex buddies. He agreed. But something unusual started to happen. We started to care about each other as more than sex buddies, asking about each other's families, jobs, and ideas on life in general. And we seemed to remember and appreciate those details. I guess we enjoyed being listened to.

I also found that I didn't feel the same old hunger to see other guys. He told me he felt the same, but insisted we take things slowly as a relationship. He even encouraged me to feel free to visit saunas when he was away on his own biz trips, arguing that would make us feel more aware of our feelings for each other. I disagreed strongly, but then, one weekend, two months into knowing him, I went to a different sauna and hooked up with a few guys. I felt guilty and told him about it. He wasn't angry and seemed to understand everything I'd said. From then on he suggested we try always to be honest with each other, especially if we'd strayed or wanted to stray. His point was that we should never have to lie, whether as sex buddies or as a couple. After a few months of purely enjoying only him, I told him I wanted a committed monogamous relationship. He told me he'd just been waiting for me to say so.

We've been together for half a year. We still live separately - he lives with his elderly mother and is a doting son as far as I can tell. Neither of us wants to move in together yet. He's out to his immediate family but prefers to keep things low-key, which is just fine with me. My family knows I'm gay, but perhaps like many Asian families, doesn't want the fact rubbed in their faces, so my distance from North America where I was born and raised and my family remains gives me a buffer. Anyway, we're often chilling at my flat. Most days are wonderful.

But I'd be lying if I said it was all smooth sailing. Despite the fact that we're both GAM, we can find it frustrating communicating with each other as my Chinese is quite limited and his English is excellent for a local but also basic. When we discuss deeper things like politics or culture, I find that something is inevitably lost in translation and with that comes a sense of compromise or oversimplification that leaves both of us feeling dissatisfied.

However, in our minds these are minor stumbling blocks so long as you desire to try to understand the other person and how he feels, how something matters to him, etc. Most importantly, we're enjoying each other's fun and attentive company. It's rare to find someone you really care about. And it sure helps when he's hot in bed! ;-) Yes, sluts will be sluts. And I feel lucky.


FuelMix says:

What a great story. We wish you and your partner all the best on your adventures. Would be delighted to receive updates from you.

Personally, FuelMix thinks Monogamy in a relationship is very, very sexy. For more on what FuelMix said about this in the blog, click the link.

Thanks for writing in.

Wanna send in your true Gay Bromance story? fuelinjectedmale@live.hk